Love is what you make it. Unfortunately, I can’t make it today, as I have a doctor’s appointment.

Then again, in some of our meetings, the Upyri bring cocktails, shaking both cocks and tails. Bitches. You can’t live with them, they can’t live without you. It’s a lose-lose situation.

Do I own my soul, or would two of my clones?

My cat mocks me frequently. It’s the universe’s way of keeping me from getting too big of an ego.

I slipped on a turtleneck, laughing when my head became stuck in the turtle part. If they weren’t called turtlenecks, I wouldn’t have worn them.

unique,” just to keep it youneeq.

We have to be back in three hours,” Ronan said. “I just fed Chainsaw but she’ll need it again.””This,” Gansey replied “is precisely why I didn’t want to have a baby with you.

Don’t try to hog loneliness and keep it all to yourself. Share it with a special someone.

I suppose I could get a job to have something to do, but working when I don’t have to work would be like pulling a straight and healthy tooth — pointless and extremely painful.”–David Palmer

Dreams are fragile. Reality is a clumsy postman.

Don’t be an artist. Be somebody’s artist.

What should I say? ‘Well, the murder was a little upsetting, and the fire did worry me a bit. I was nearly date-raped and my ex best friend is crazy. But, hey, at least I’m...

I am the red in remembered. Why am I red? Because I’m embarrassed.

You’re here. I’m here. I love you. I’m gonna pee all over the floor about it.

I fucking hate you.” Women! They can be so confusing and hard to understand with the cryptic way they speak.

Also not the kind of place to hide a server.””Is that another pun?” She asked.”No! I swear! I didn’t mean that one.”~Shell Game, Kingdom Keepers #5

If you have one dollar and I have a hundred dollars, I could say I have a hundred times the amount of money you do. And while that’s true, it makes me sound wealthy and...

No old Men (excepting Dr. Wallis) love Mathematicks.

The art teacher’s scarlet book was called Story of the Eye by Georges Bataille. ‘As the title suggests,’ Mr Dunwoody saw the book’d caught my attention, ‘it’s about the history of opticians. What are you...

I’m running a marathon. I won’t be jogging, walking, or sprinting, but I will be overseeing it.

Stupid English.””English isn’t stupid,” I say.”Well, my English teacher is.” He makes a face. “Mr. Franklin assigned an essay about our favorite subject, and I wanted to write about lunch, but he won’t let me.””Why...

He’s got the world’s softest knuckles. They’re like rubber the way they bounce off my steel balls.

Cats can do whatever they want, whenever they want, without regard to what anyone says or does. Rather like Princesses.

From CATS ARE KIND”I saw a dog pursuing automobiles;On and on he sped.I was puzzled by this;I accosted the dog.’If you catch one,’ I said’What will you do with it?”Dumb cat,’ he cried,And ran on.

No. I don’t give that number out to every Tom, Dick and Dracula,” Morgan muttered.

It’s okay to be a loser, it just depends on how good you are at being one.

The first permanent structure in Jacksonville was a school/saloon. It was built by the Irish.

Superman once challenged Chuck Norris to a fight, the loser had to wear his underwear on the outside.

I love you” the whole way, but you couldn’t hear me, probably because that man you were with was talking the whole time.

Ignorance is bliss, except when it hurts

I love animals, especially with barbeque sauce.

Where else,” I will say, “does an old turtle crossing the path Make all the difference in the world?

Remember: if you see something, say nothing, and drink to forget.

A brick could be used to smash my bottled up rage, and a blanket could be laid down beforehand to catch the shards.

conservative n.A person who possesses an underdeveloped taste for tyranny.liberal n.A person who believes in liberty, but only for the state.

It’s a fact that when it comes to dating, men are all visual. Well, except blind men.

No one believes a liar. Even when she’s telling the truth.

I want to understand the elements that compose courage in the same way I understand the periodic table. I feel that by knowing the periodic table of courage I can be courageous, at least periodically.

My name’s Zara. I’m strong, I’m fast, and I totally kick ass. It’s great to be me…but that means right now it sucks to be you.

I had a dream about you. You were an escalator, and I was a flight of stairs. You thought I was a Luddite, and I thought I was as ostrich, because I hadn’t figured out...

A pile of hairy towels is not a passable substitute for a dog.

We are all born rude. No infant has ever appeared yet with the grace to understand how inconsiderate it is to disturb others in the middle of the night.

I killed my clone. It’s not murder, it’s partial suicide. I want a stiff drink, but not alcohol. I want formaldehyde.

In the darkened recesses of the Suburban, my opinion of the vampire rose considerably. There were far worse things than having to drink blood to survive. I could tolerate him, so long as he didn’t...

Underwater nobody can dance. Let this be a lesson in basket weaving. And love.

Photons have mass? I didn’t even know they were Catholic.

… an artist should paint from the heart, and not always what people expect. Predictability often leads to the dullest work, in my opinion, and we have been bored stiff long enough I think.

I had a dream about you. You had a gun to my head, figuratively speaking. In a literal sense you were holding a needle to my temple, because I was Mr. Bubblegumhead. I just wanted...

I’m so sorry. I think I’m just tired.” The socially accepted excuse for being mental.

I gave three quiet cheers for Minnesota. In Seattle a dusty inch of anything white and chilly means the city lapses into full-on panic mode, as if each falling flake crashes to earth with its...