Having a clone to bounce ideas off of would be a way to generate more ideas. Another way would be to build an idea generator that plugs into a wall socket and works only when...

A lifestyle of deception is hard to keep up if your clones aren’t willing to participate.

The older I get, the more I’ve got going for me. Each yesterday is a new me I’ve got working for my collective experience, like an army of clones.

What if a statue of me walked past my clone frozen in thought? Which one of the two would make a better quarterback than Geno Smith?

Can you be in love with more than one person and only one person at the same time? Yes, if you’re in love with two clones.

Out of all the guys she could love, I am two of them. But she chose my clone over me and that hurts. And it feels good.

The Bible says man has sin nature, but do clones have sin nature?

A high five is a two-person applause. Me and my clone will be excited to clap for you after we present you with the Julius Caesar Author of the Year Award. Keep up the great...

Aside from myself, there aren’t too many people trying to be me. That may change in the future, when all my clones arrive.

Clones: Why should you take the blame for your mistakes when there’s a genetic replica of yourself that’d make a perfectly good scapegoat?

If I’m having a conversation with my clone, am I having an interior dialogue externally?

I’m quoting my clone, because he quoted me thinking if I said it, he said it. He thought he was quoting himself when he quoted me. So in effect I’m quoting myself quoting myself, with...

I have assigned myself a Hooray Factor of five. This is the top level, and is the only level that has a physical representation—that of a high five. But don’t try to give me a...

Aside from murder alibis and kinky sex, what good are clones?

A mafia don could snap his fingers and somebody would snap my neck. But when I snap my fingers, people start dancing. Or at least my clones would.

A shadow is midnight’s whisper, I thought as I shouted at my invisible clone. Killing your own clone is the only time you could commit murder and suicide at the same time by killing just...

My new book is going well. It’s practically writing itself! Actually, what I mean is I’m not writing it, my clone is.

In the future.” But how’d I know I’d show up, and not my clone posing as me?

I know what it means to be alone, especially in a large group of clones.

During conversation, I have no problem making eye contact—with myself in the mirror. Or with my clone, if he’s not rolling his eyes because he knows what I’m going to say.

My goal is to have the most and the best of what I desire. And since I desire clones, I have to be the best me first.

I want to drown in all the ink used to write positive things about my clone and how great he is.

My girlfriend has two aliases. Clones aside, it’s the only time I’ve ever felt like I was cheating on one person with the same person.

Can you ever really say you know anybody—your clone included? Still, if my clone’s birthday were coming up, I’d only shop Buy One Get One Free deals.

Love one person at a time, that’s the motto I’ll try to get my clones to live by.

Before I’ll take my clone on as a pupil in the craft of writing, he must prove his worthiness. He must write 100 thoughts down, of which 10 might be interesting. If he’s done that,...

The future seems so crowded to me. All I see is me, me, me, me, me and a million other clones of myself.

A clone would make a great birthday gift, because it’s the only gift that keeps on giving. At least it’d better give me a birthday present every year. It owes its life to me.

Is talking to your clone like talking to yourself, talking to someone else, both, or in the middle?

I think it’s important to set goals for myself, goals for the future, goals that I’ll demand my clones achieve for me.

When I see a poor person I think of me, and then I think, maybe I should pay my clones for all the work they do for me. Then I think, nah, they’re only slaves....

My baseball team is called the I Ams. Just me and my clones on the roster. We’re devastating. Well, at least I am.

I couldn’t steal an idea. Not even if my clone came up with it. But I could steal your heart—even if my clone had it stored in a cryogenic freezer.

He’ll think I’ll do it, he’ll act like I’ll do it, and so I will do it. But if he will think differently, maybe I will act differently. But I know me, I know him,...

I’d say my writing voice is original, and I don’t think you’ll find another quite like it. This makes me sad, because when all my clones arrive sometime in the future, their only hope is...

I put the men in mental. Well, me and my clones do. Alone I just put in the man.

I want to give the gift of life—to myself, in the form of my clone. So I’ll be giving myself myself, and I’ll be grateful—and so will I.

I see things in windows and I say to myself that I want them. I want them because I want to belong. I want to be liked by more people, I want to be held...

To take another person’s life for personal gain is the most selfish act imaginable. Especially when that other person is your clone.

My clones better not wear invisible cloaks. How am I supposed to find myself as a person if I can’t even find my clones?

You can’t put a price tag on human life. But if you could, I’d demand coupons for clones.

Do I own my soul, or would two of my clones?

If somebody kills me, at least I won’t be accused of murder. Well, assuming all my clones have alibis.

Writing all day every day is good, but it’s not good enough. You need to have your clone ghostwriting for you too.

Not many men will love you like me. Of course, I’m not many men. I’m just several men. Or I will be, once my clones arrive.

Most people have a list of 100 books to read before they die, or 100 places to visit. Not me. I have a list of 100 birthdays to see. No need to write them down,...

I boasted that I bested the best, and I did. I beat my clone. In my dream, of course, but who cares? It’s still a victory.

Gar taldin ni jaonyc; gar sa buir, ori’wadaasla. (Nobody cares who your father was, only the father you’ll be.) – Mandalorian saying

I’d rather be me being me than me trying to be my own clone. I try to stay true to who I am as a person, not a genetically modified being.

If I had my clone take a test for me, it’s likely I’d misspell my own name. And I’m terrible at remembering people’s names—even if that person is me.