Quotes.wiki
  • Home
  • Tags
  • Authors
  • Contact Us
">
Quotes.wiki
Quotes.wiki
  • Home
  • Tags
  • Authors
  • Contact Us
Clones  Quotes
Question for your life: If Socrates had a clone, would he advise that clone to know thy self, or to know myself, with myself in this case being himself?

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
AdviseCloneClones
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
It’s not really masturbating if you’re jacking your clone off. It’s more like politics.

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
ClonesPolitics
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
If I own a business, I work for myself. And if I have no revenue, I work for free. That’s not slavery. That’ll be the case when I employ 1,000,000,000 clones of myself. I won’t...

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
BusinessClonesSlavery
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
The thing that has impacted life on earth the most is life on mars. That’s where the government is storing all my clones.

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
AliensClonesEarth
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
I’m older than myself. At least I will be, once my clone gets here.

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
AbsurdAgeBizarre
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
I want to meet a woman named Sherry who only drinks brandy, and a woman named Brandy who only drinks sherry. Then I’ll offer each one of them one magical night of sex with me,...

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
AlcoholBrandyClones
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
Only strong women, and they seem to be rare, can handle a frank and direct woman who doesn’t sweet-talk or need others to nerve her. You can identify the easily intimidated because they need a...

—Donna Lynn

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
AloneCandorClones
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
You can’t be the best all the time. But that’s what clones are for—to be you while you sleep.

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
ClonesSleep
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
The worst part about clones is you could be both innocent and guilty at the same time. I didn’t do it—but I did, in the form of my clone.

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
ClonesGuiltHumor
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
If my clone were standing next to me, I’d be beside myself with joy. I’d also be literally beside myself. In that case, I’ll bet you’d love me twice as much, huh?

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
AbsurdCloneClones
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
My face and body are not my essence. My actions, ideas, and ideals are the stuff of me. My clone will have my face and body, but he won’t be me.

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
ActionsBodyClone
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
I am two lucky guys.

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
CloneClonesHumor
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
When there is extra to be eaten, I’ll be there, and I’ll be hungry. When there is more love than people to absorb it all, I’ll be there, and I’ll invite my clones.

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
ClonesFoodHumor
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
At my last birthday party I had fun and really let myself go. Literally. I opened the cages where I keep my clones and I let myself go, all 333 versions of myself.

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
AbsurdAbsurdityBirthday
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
Agatha had so much love she could fill a room. A room filled with strange men, which she often did. I don’t care if every single man in that room looked exactly like me, they...

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
ClonesFunnyLove
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
We’re going to go in the back room as two singles, copulate back there, and come out a couple. Somebody go tell my clone where I am so he doesn’t go file a missing person’s...

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
ClonesCopulateHumor
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
Elms are dying all over the place, it’s Dutch elm disease. […] It came from America on a load of logs, and it’s a fungal disease. That makes it sound even more as if it...

—Jo Walton

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
AnalogyArbologyBotany
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
I want to find myself as a person, and I’ve enlisted the help of my clone to aid me in this. It’s like finding Waldo, except I’m only half wearing the red and white sweater,...

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
CloneClonesHumor
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
When I need to be in two places at once, make two decisions at once, that’s what clones are for.

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
ClonesDecisionsHumor
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
It’s not you, it’s me.” This line could signify rejection, or it could be something I say in the future, when I’m talking to one of my clones about another one of my clones.

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
ClonesFutureHumor
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
Having a clone to bounce ideas off of would be a way to generate more ideas. Another way would be to build an idea generator that plugs into a wall socket and works only when...

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
ClonesHumorIdeas
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
A lifestyle of deception is hard to keep up if your clones aren’t willing to participate.

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
ClonesDeceptionHumor
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
The older I get, the more I’ve got going for me. Each yesterday is a new me I’ve got working for my collective experience, like an army of clones.

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
ClonesCloningExperience
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
What if a statue of me walked past my clone frozen in thought? Which one of the two would make a better quarterback than Geno Smith?

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
AbsurdCloneClones
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
Can you be in love with more than one person and only one person at the same time? Yes, if you’re in love with two clones.

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
ClonesFunnyParadox
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
Out of all the guys she could love, I am two of them. But she chose my clone over me and that hurts. And it feels good.

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
AcceptanceCloneClones
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
The Bible says man has sin nature, but do clones have sin nature?

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
ClonesHumorSin
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
A high five is a two-person applause. Me and my clone will be excited to clap for you after we present you with the Julius Caesar Author of the Year Award. Keep up the great...

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
ApplauseAuthor-Of-The-YearAwards
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
Aside from myself, there aren’t too many people trying to be me. That may change in the future, when all my clones arrive.

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
ClonesFutureHumor
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
Clones: Why should you take the blame for your mistakes when there’s a genetic replica of yourself that’d make a perfectly good scapegoat?

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
BlameClonesGenetic
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
If I’m having a conversation with my clone, am I having an interior dialogue externally?

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
ClonesConversationHumor
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
I’m quoting my clone, because he quoted me thinking if I said it, he said it. He thought he was quoting himself when he quoted me. So in effect I’m quoting myself quoting myself, with...

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
ClonesHumorQuote
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
I have assigned myself a Hooray Factor of five. This is the top level, and is the only level that has a physical representation—that of a high five. But don’t try to give me a...

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
AbsurdCloneClones
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
Aside from murder alibis and kinky sex, what good are clones?

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
ClonesFunnyKinky-Sex
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
A mafia don could snap his fingers and somebody would snap my neck. But when I snap my fingers, people start dancing. Or at least my clones would.

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
ClonesDancingFamily
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
A shadow is midnight’s whisper, I thought as I shouted at my invisible clone. Killing your own clone is the only time you could commit murder and suicide at the same time by killing just...

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
CloneClonesHumor
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
My new book is going well. It’s practically writing itself! Actually, what I mean is I’m not writing it, my clone is.

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
ClonesHumorWriting
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
In the future.” But how’d I know I’d show up, and not my clone posing as me?

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
ClonesFutureHumor
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
I know what it means to be alone, especially in a large group of clones.

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
AloneClonesLonely
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
During conversation, I have no problem making eye contact—with myself in the mirror. Or with my clone, if he’s not rolling his eyes because he knows what I’m going to say.

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
CloneClonesConversation
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
My goal is to have the most and the best of what I desire. And since I desire clones, I have to be the best me first.

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
ClonesDesireGoals
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
I want to drown in all the ink used to write positive things about my clone and how great he is.

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
AbsurdClonesFunny
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
My girlfriend has two aliases. Clones aside, it’s the only time I’ve ever felt like I was cheating on one person with the same person.

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
AliasAliasesCheating
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
Can you ever really say you know anybody—your clone included? Still, if my clone’s birthday were coming up, I’d only shop Buy One Get One Free deals.

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
BirthdayBirthdaysBuy-One-Get-One-Free
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
Love one person at a time, that’s the motto I’ll try to get my clones to live by.

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
AbsurdClonesFunny
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
Before I’ll take my clone on as a pupil in the craft of writing, he must prove his worthiness. He must write 100 thoughts down, of which 10 might be interesting. If he’s done that,...

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
CloneClonesHumor
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
The future seems so crowded to me. All I see is me, me, me, me, me and a million other clones of myself.

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
ClonesFutureHumor
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
A clone would make a great birthday gift, because it’s the only gift that keeps on giving. At least it’d better give me a birthday present every year. It owes its life to me.

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
BirthdayBirthday-GiftBirthday-Present
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
Is talking to your clone like talking to yourself, talking to someone else, both, or in the middle?

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
CloneClonesConversation
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
I think it’s important to set goals for myself, goals for the future, goals that I’ll demand my clones achieve for me.

—Jarod Kintz

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...
ClonesGoalsHumor
Facebooktwitterredditpinterestlinkedintumblr
  • Page 1 of 3
  • Next
  • Terms of Service
  • Privacy Policy
  • About us

Copyright © 2017 - 2020 TR Marketing Group, Inc. All rights reserved.

Do Not Sell My Personal Information

Exercise your consumer rights by contacting us below Privacy Policy

[email protected]

Personalized advertisements

Turning this off will opt you out of personalized advertisements delivered from Google on this website.

CookiePro
Confirm
Popup Button popup close button