Izzy was utterly convinced. Never mind Arabian horses, African cheetahs. No creature in the world could bolt so quickly as a rake confronted with the word “marriage”. They ought to shout it out at footraces...

Coach,” Annabeth said, “it was an accident. We were talking, and we fell asleep.””Besides,” Percy said, “you’re starting to sound like Terminus.”Hedge narrowed his eyes. “Is that an insult, Jackson? ‘Cause I’ll-I’ll Terminus you, buddy!

The stench that surrounded me suggested that the tarp over my face had been previously used either to transport fertiliser or as toilet paper.

Clary?” he thought.Her voice came through, tinged with alarm. “What is it? What’s happened? Did my mom find out I’m gone?””Not yet,” he thought back. “Is Azazel the cat from the Smurfs?”There was a long...

Well, then, he ought to write her a letter. He ought to say: ‘This is to tell you that I propose to live with you as soon as this show is over. You will be...

Shoes are stupid. Why do people wear them?” -BlissHe laughed, “So they don’t step on a nail and get tetanus, that’s why.” -Cade”Wear. Where. Wear. W’s are “-Bliss

I hate when new parents ask who the baby looks like ! It was born 15 minutes ago it looks like a potato.

The wind is knocked out of me; and when I look up, I see Nine spitting blood out. He’s grinning. “Are you crazy?” I ask. “You’re enjoying this?” “I’ve been locked up for over a...

I’m simpley one hell of a butler.

Si un inglés se siente incómodo en una situación (es decir, en todas) prepara té. Es una regla universal: cuando no sepas qué hacer, pon la tetera en marcha. ,Que van a amputarte una pierna?...

Angélique Sookie, toi qui es la beauté et la gr ce incarnées, pardonne-moi. Je suis accablé à l’idée que cette ménade malfaisante et démoniaque ait pu oser violenter ce corps parfait et voluptueux qui est...

I did Google him, you know.””Oh, so you GOOGLED him Oh, well, that changes everything then, doesn’t it? What could I possibly worry about now that I know you’ve conducted such a thorough Internet search?

Enough!” ter Borcht said.

Kindness, motherfucker, kindness.

What a cool name. Where’d you get it?””I’ve always had it.

How do you feel about helicopters?”There was a long pause. “How do you mean? Ethically?””As a mode of transportation.””Faster than camels, but less sustainable.

We don’t have dealings. He just stalks me. I’m popular like that.

I will get your some clothes, a sword, and your very own assassin to join you on your quest.””Ooh, just what I’ve always wanted. A man whose job title had the word ass in it...

I will pull your pancreas out through your nose and feed it back to you in a drip inserted into your anus is that clear?

An animated conversation was in progress and the woman behind the counter started airing her views about a murder case that had created some stir in Algiers. A young commercial employee had killed an Algerian...

There are two covenants that cease to exist in the Master’s Kingdom – death and marriage.””What an appropriate pairing,” I muse.”He thought so.

You, my child, will marry well. More than once.” (…) The lady retrieved the cards and shuffled them back together into one stack in an attitude of dismissal.Taking this as a sign her fortune was...

We’re like the Three Musketeers, searching for truth and justice and the American way.:Glitch snorted. “More like the Three Blind Mice, stumbling around trying to find a hunk of cheese in the dark.

Electrical shivers shoot up my leg. And my knee is such a slut!She likes it! She’s that friend you have. The one who you tell you’re on a diet and the next day shows up...

I swore I would love you ’til the end of time, so now I’m praying for the end of time to hurry up and arrive.

Like…um, the Little Mermaid?

You drool when you sleep

(Sebastian) “See, there you go. You’re always looking at me like that.””Like what?””Like I burn down animal shelters for fun and light my cigarettes with orphans.

is push you off the roof.

When your done releasing sexual tensions, we have a meeting to continue!”~Francis Bonnefoy, Hetalia, English Dub

If you turn into a hideous monster and I am sent to slay you, I will remember this and make it as painless as I can, out of respect for you.

Fair enough. You want some of mine?

dying, crying, hyperventilating

―Es solo una hora ―empezó a decir de nuevo, pero la rabia de las multitudes tiene efectos secundarios: enturbia la mente y ensordece a sus víctimas. Debía cambiar de táctica―. ¡Mirad, el Rey de España!Pero...

Love is as we will it to be.” ~ Amunhotep El Bey

I guess I’m too dumb to see the difference.

There you have it: our lives in a nutshell. Emphasis on nut.

Let’s say you have an ax. Just a cheap one, from Home Depot. On one bitter winter day, you use said ax to behead a man. Don’t worry, the man was already dead. Or maybe...

If you don’t realize a deja vu, you have to realize you’re creating a deja vu

Are you really going to work in that?” Maura asked.Blue looked at her clothing. It involved a few thin layering shirts, including one she had altered using a method called shredding. “What’s wrong with it?”Maura...

I’m sorry I missed the meeting and hurt your little feely-weels okay?

Well, so you don’t get too cocky, I myself often complete the TV Guide crossword puzzle.” He puffed out his chest. “In pen.

Yes, my style sucks. But at least I didn’t bowl half a game with a nacho stuck to my ass.

Lolzez

The only thing that frightens me, Chloe, is that you keep lessening the six degrees of separation in our lives.

I’m trying to compliment you,” Barclay say. “Can’t you just say thanks?

And,” Amber said, practically drooling as she ogled him, “it’s tradition for new arrivals to help with the pep rally.”Brooklyn quirked her lips in doubt. “Tradition?””It’s a new tradition,” Amber shot back.”Clearly the deeper meaning...

She went in the pool,” she finished for me. “Ohmigod. She was killed while tweeting. It was Twittercide!

She spoke throught her teeth. “Almost, dear. What were the real words you used? The bad words. It’s okay to say them again, just this once.” I shrugged, “fine. I said’. . . just ’cause...

You hate birthdays yet pee your pants over presents. There is clearly something wrong with you,” Garrett joked.