Rose pictured him standing at the boundary of the Ogletree house in that enormous fur cape, with a giant sword sticking over his shoulder, roaring at the top of his lungs and then being upset...

It’s a reflex. Hear a bell, get food. See an undead, throw a knife. Same thing, really.

That’s all right,” she told him. “I can manage. I can sleep outside just fine.”Four pairs of eyes looked at her with a distinctly male skepticism.

The last time Assistant Principal Parker called, a girl in the school’s locker room had accused Julie of being a whore during the two years she’d spent on the street. My kid took exception to...

I live alone.””And your point is?””You have the Pack. You’re surrounded by people who would fall over themselves for the pleasure of your company. I have no one. My parents are dead, my entire family...

We don’t need teenage bouda sex fiends as interns.How do you know he is a sex fiend?He is fifteen and he’s a bouda. Hello?

I had to give it him, to flatter and insult a woman in one propostition took talent.

Hold your horses. I’m coming.”…”From where I’m standing you’re just breathing laboriously.”The snow swam out of focus. “Breathing hard. Are you coming or just breathing hard. You’ve got to get your one-liners straight.

Black hair, angelic face, and devil eyes.

How are you?””Perfectly fine,” he said.”Are your ribs broken?””Probably not. Cracked at most. We fought very carefully.””Did this settle anything?””It made me feel better,” he said, sitting up. “Did you see me kick him in...

It seems that the young woman made some indelicate suggestion of a threesome…When I got there, Miss Nash was standing by the hot tub in a small bikini, pointing the business end of a SIG-Sauer...

I trusted her about as far as I could throw her. I was strong and she was small, but it still wasn’t very far.

When walking into the lair of the dragon after robbing his hoard, the least you could do is hold you head high […]

Shapeshifter parenting motto—if your kid slits somebody’s throat, always have a backup plan to make the body disappear.

Who snitched?””We have people monitoring police radio frequencies. They gave Jim a heads-up in case our security had to storm PAD offices and bust you out of there. I found out when I saw Jim...

He glued the chair to my ass.”Silence.”Is it still…attached?””I can’t get it off.

It was the kind of place you went when your earthly troubles became too much for you and you were looking for a creative way to commit suicide.

If anybody comes to challenge you, we’ll kick their ass. We’ll find a way to handle Roland. And if the pack Council produces any kittens, we’ll give them to Jim to raise., He needs to...

Mom?” Mother turned to Grandmother.”What?””She’s going to lunch with her kidnapper!””Take a picture for me,” Grandma said.

Minutes passed by. A little blue butterfly landed on my nose. I blinked at it and it fluttered to my ear. A big yellow butterfly gently floated over and landed on my paw. Soon a...

You can do without sleep or without food, but not without both and sleep wasn’t an option.

Man can’t handle the chaos. Oh, you can understand it in the abstract, as long as you don’t think about it too hard. But at the core of it, whenever humans come against chaos, they...

I got a dog-training book. It says Grendel needs mental stimulation, so I tried to train him, but I think he must be retarded.

Mmmmm, yummy chocolate” after waking up from hunger pains and finding a Hershey bar in an empty refrigerator.

Some men were handsome. Some were powerful. Curran was…dangerous.

The vampire leaned forward, tapping a scimitar claw. “Is that a lion with horns and a pitchfork?””Yep.””Is he carrying a moon on his pitchfork?””No, it’s a pie.

Now remember, Kate.” Barabas leaned over to me, grinning. “You are the Consort. Be the Consort.” He stretched “be” into a three-syllable word. “Think like a-“”Open the door or I’ll punch you right in the...

I have a serious question.””I will give a serious answer.””Can a god be killed?”The humor drained from Roman’s face. “Well, that depends on if you’re a pantheist or a Marxist.””What’s the difference?””The first believes that...

Did he just rip out the engine?” I asked.”Yes”, Saiman said. “And now he is demolishing the Maserati with it.”Ten seconds later Curran hurled the twisted wreck of black and orange that used to be...

Jack didn’t fully get Jesus. Audrey tried to explain it, and he could repeat it back to her, word for word, but he still didn’t comprehend most of it. The best he could gather was...

It seems that we had…not a better education, per se, but perhaps more incentive to use it. They learn, but they hardly think.

Psych.”And just like that, he was out the door and gone.Oh boy.

I wouldn’t be able to do anything with my vampire horde except make it run around in a herd, but it would be a very impressive herd.

They really kicked me out?” “Refunded the tuition and everything.” Julie blinked a couple of times coming to grips with this tidbit. “So what happens now?” “I expect you’ll be a bum. Homeless and jobless...

In there?’She nodded.’You want us to go into the tortoise?’Another nod.’It’s alive.’Another nod.

If I lost him here, to this idiotic fight, after I fought and guarded him for two weeks, after I cried and thought he was dying, I would find him in the afterlife and I...

I mean to have you, Rose, you and all of your thorns. I’m a disagreeable and stubborn bastard, but I’m not a fool. You didn’t really expect me to pass you up, did you?

It took a qualified wizard to detect a summoning in progress. It required only a half-literate idiot with a twitch of power and a dim idea of how to use it to attempt one. Before...

I turned to leave and paused before the gap in the ruined wall. “One last thing, Your Majesty. I’d like a name I can put into my report, something shorter than typing out ‘The Leader...

If she died as a result of this journey, it wouldn’t be because of slavers. It would be because Richard’s inability to communicate would give her a heart attack.

You know what I like about you? You have no sense. You sit here in my house, you can barely hold a spoon, and you’re telling me ‘no’. You’d pull on Death’s whiskers if you...

Tiny gold sparks flared in his irises. “You’re in my rooms in my bathtub naked and you’re still mouthing off.”Did he expect anything different? “Hey, I didn’t kick or punch you in the throat. I...

You think he’s got ‘government badass’ tattooed on his chest?” I murmured.A faint grimace skewed Luther’s mouth. “And ‘I’d tell you but I’d have to kill you’ on his ass.

Juke glanced into her cup before tipping it down to her mouth. “Screw you!””Now come on, sugar, you know I don’t swing that way.””Whatever!

What happened?””You fell.””Really? What did I fall into?””My fist.””That explains the headache.

Mahon’s wife stared down at us. Her hands went to her hips. “Which one of you idiots wants to explain to me what the hell is going on?”With great effort I raised my arm and...

He raised his hand in a peaceful gesture. “You need to relax a bit, dove. Like Mouse over there. You trust me, don’t you, Mouse?””Nope!””Ahhh, I’m hurt. Nobody likes me.

Amy,” Elsie Moore said in her crackling voice, her gaze fixed on Declan. “I want you to get me a new bear. A blond one.

Did those nice church ladies come by again?” He nodded. “I asked them if a man died and then the woman remarried, and then the three of them met in heaven, would it be a...

Put your badass faces on and follow me.