Austin sounds a little bit like Aston Martin, which is the type of car James Bond would drive.

It was because a great-looking man with no apparent mental defects found her attractive. Imagine feeling so buoyant over something so juvenile.

Ye are a scoundrel, a black-hearted robber and a rogue,’ Stubble said cheerily to the grumbling captain. It was his usual way of haggling, and he’d beaten down the riverman to a decent price for...

There is in every village a torch- the schoolteacher; and an extinguisher: the priest.

I can’t read your mind, you idiot.

I play basketball on Sundays and I’m a very spiritual guy; I read a lot of Eastern philosophy and I meditate.

If we get a 3D printer at the office, the first thing I’m printing with it is a new 3D printer just for me!

Yo Mama’s like a library, open to the public.

I want to drown in all the ink used to write positive things about my clone and how great he is.

I think I just blew my own mind.

A true friend doesn’t have guts; they beat you up and later plead with you to beat them back.

My tendency to make up stories and lie compulsively for the sake of my own amusement takes up a good portion of my day and provides me with a peace of mind not easily attainable...

Eternity is not a super-abundance of time, but timelessness.

As the nicknames get shorter, people come closer.

I restrain myself from following orders—especially restraining orders. I’d like to remind my dad that my love is longer than 500 feet.

I believe that the government that governs best is a government that governs least, and by these standards we have set up a fabulous government in Iraq.

Honestly, I feel like I am a leading man, and it’s just going to take the right project, the female and the right studio. It’s got to all gel together, you know what I mean?

I love ghosts; I prefer ghosts to some people.

Why are we so addicted to social media?Because, our limbic system is craving for rewards, pleasure, acceptance and expansion through mind.

What do you suppose is the use of a child without any meaning? Even a joke should have some meaning– and a child’s more imporant than a joke, I hope. You couldn’t deny that, even...

Any lustful fool can love a million women, but only a real man can love one woman cloned a million times.

He’d gone from sixteen to seventy-five in a matter of seconds, but the old-man smell happened instantly, like boom. Congratulations! You stink!

If you’re a struggling artist having money problems just superglue a brick in the middle of a blanket, and call it art. Someone will buy it.

I loved her as long as a midget. It was gruesome, and then I grew some.

First blood is mine.Last blood counts for more.–Artemis Entreri and Drizzt Do’Urden

We conquer the Independence Day aliens by having a Macintosh laptop computer upload a software virus to the mothership (which happens to be one-fifth the mass of the Moon), thus disarming its protective force field....

It’s absolutely unfair for women to say that guys only want one thing: sex. We also want food.

I work hard. The staff and crew see how much energy I put into this project, and it makes them step up.

Bir ilk buluşmada kadın rahatça yemek yiyorsa, o erkeği çoktan elemiştir kafasında.

I rolled my eyes, trying to keep my eyes off his body, just the sight of his abs or arms was enough to make me want to get naked and let Carlo take over anything...

He made a sound of disgust in the back of his throat. “Oh thank you so much. That’s what every man wants to hear about his name. You might as well call me ‘Little Pecker’...

I guess I can’t blame him for feeling bitter. Going from being the terror of Bulgarian nights to a janitor would kinda suck

In high school I barely made the rodeo team. But I wasn’t good enough to start, so I just rode the bench.

Because I feel as if I let it down. As if it needed something from me, I was its only hope, and now that hope is gone.”What penis doesn’t try to make you feel that...

—En verdad me gusta, quien sabe cómo el estar con él cambie mi vida, probablemente va a ser increíble.—,Y si cambia las cosas para mal?, ,Y si quiere robarte tu dinero, o secuestrarte, o cortarte...

I bet she likes it hard, from behind, probably likes to get spanked too. I mean, just look at her, she has a serious come-fuck-me-face.

Fee-fi-fo-fum, you better run and hideI smell the blood of a petty little coward

I was feeling the height of bitchiness.

Give me that pointy thing,” as I point with my pointy finger.

Who in the universe halts when the enemy tells them to?

Whispers followed me down the hall. Ignoring them was harder than I´d imagined. Every Cell in my body demanded that I confront them. And do what? Jump on them like a crazy spider monkey and...

Just to show my dad that I think he’s number one, I bought him a urinal cake for his birthday.

Well, it’s just that… that’s going to hurt a bit, my dear. Go on, bend over. I’ll demonstrate.

What kind of person doesn’t let you have gummi bears?

I want to see an elephant hunt down a man for the sole purpose of collecting his teeth, while a chorus of typewriters sings songs that praises the bananas for their wisdom, leadership, and their...

Tease.

Hey, he’s not using a holster,” I said, glancing at Alex’s on the dresser. He laughed out loud. “Yeah, I guess he must want something shooting off. It’d be so great if these things were...

I consider seeing my 30th birthday an accomplishment. You know, not many midgets live to be this tall.

you were adorable.

Oh, this is the most TRAGICAL thing that ever happened to me!