The word ‘weird’ is never spoken or thought of by the Fey, as to them there is nothing very strange when you take it as it is.

I’m a lion in a strange land.

Ph’nglui mglw’nafh Cthulhu R’lyeh wgah’nagl fhtagn.In his house at R’lyeh dead Cthulhu waits dreaming.

Here march the eaters of earth, the swallowers of rain.

You say freak, I say unique.

I think the British audience might be more open-minded with some of my imagery and weird choices.

A brick could be sawed in half and each half glued under the back of a shoe to form high heels.

A brick could be used to wade into dangerous territory with a man named Wade who builds houses made only of wood. But if you’re going to play with fire, I suggest you wear a...

A blanket could be used to crack the code of love. What is it, where do I find it, and how much do I charge people to buy it once I do find a reliable...

A blanket could be used to help acclimate your body for your after death experience. Hell is hot, so you’d better warm up first.

A brick could be used to help you to become a karate master, like I am. It’s easy to punch the brick and break it, but can you punch a brick, shatter it, and then...

If a blanket could be used to keep one person warm, then it stands to reason that all the blankets in the world are to blame for global warming, and I think our political leaders,...

A blanket could be used like Lenny McDenny says hello. He never says hi, because he only says goodbye. He’s always leaving and never arriving. I’m like that too, except I’m always arriving and never...

A blanket, no matter how thin, could be sliced thinner, and in this way one blanket could be used to keep a multitude of people warm. But not that warm.

A brick could be used to dispel the very same lies that a blanket could be used to cover up.

A brick could be used like the point where always meets never. I mean come on, who wouldn’t want to watch a brick levitate?

Caveat Emptor.”

A brick could be used like March 5th marches in a marching band. And guess what, as the marching band director, I am the cement that holds everyone’s shoes in sync at the bottom of...

A brick could be used as a fashion accessory. Or an accessory to murder. I believe the phrase is, “If looks could kill.

Life, will be a very great deal less weird without you!

It makes me feel kind of weird, but obviously the Man Upstairs gave me something and it touches people, and I’m just so blessed.

A brick could be wrapped in plastic and sold individually to toddlers as toys. (Warning: Bricks can be harmful if swallowed. If ingested, please contact a physician first, and then the manager of a circus.)

A brick is a good object to hide a house key under. No burglar will be able to get to your key, especially if you hide it under the first brick the mason’s lay when...

A brick could be used to keep yourself warm, and a blanket could be used in the construction of a house. But just like wearing your boxers on the outside of your pants, if you...

This is ridiculous. I’m talking to a horse about politics.

Remember what?” And that’s precisely my point—you can’t even remember what you can’t remember, and I’m here with a blanket to help. So scoot over and let me lay in your bed with you.

A blanket could be used as one square on a giant checkerboard.

I rather be weird than boring and bored.

For Ryan’s Daughter I used a total of eight harps, something that was, at least, weird.

All forms of madness, bizarre habits, awkwardness in society, general clumsiness, are justified in the person who creates good art.

My love for Neo-Tokyo is a bulbous massof post-human organic circuitry.Cyperpunk is my mother tongue.My love is a man-machine interface gun.

I’m not cool, I’m weird!

A blanket could be used to stop gun violence. Make sleep, not war.

A brick could be used to make it harder for people to achieve their dreams. A brick is just another obstacle they have to overcome if they are going to achieve their goals.

A blanket could be used to announce your intention to announce your intentions. Make sure the blanket is neon orange though, or you might not get the attention you deserve.

A brick could be translated into Spanish, and then used to landscape a lawn.

A blanket could be used to confuse and disorient. Think of it not as a bed adornment, but as a really big blindfold.

A blanket could be used as a parachute, for jumping out of dreams.

A blanket could be used to keep me from exploding. My patience is wearing thin, and my clothes are also wearing thin, and in some spots you can see through the material, so a blanket...

A brick could be a breath freshener for a dragon. But so could a mint-flavored baby.

A brick could be used to satisfy your hunger—and satisfy my curiosity.

A brick could be used to show how patient you are. Somewhere between one brick and a million bricks lies a home. For me, my home is one brick, and I carry it with me...

A brick could be used as bait for the vampire shark. Since nobody’s ever seen a vampire shark, let alone caught one, I think it would be unreasonable to dismiss the idea entirely.

A brick could be used to gauge the level of reciprocated sexual interest of the person or object of your desire. A brick works best, however, when the focus of your lust is the brick...

A brick could be used to describe somebody hard and inflexible, and a blanket could be used to describe somebody warm and easygoing.

33 old people went into a nursing home, and only 34 people came out alive. One old woman died while giving birth to twins.

Politics.

A brick could be used as a doorstop. But that’s obvious. What isn’t obvious is why somebody would want to stop a door, since doors represent openness. What is that person hiding behind that door...

I lay warm in bed like a melted marshmallow in a graham cracker. I really wish my blanket wasn’t so rigid and crumbly.

A blanket could be hooked to ropes and attached to the body of a swimmer in training, to provide resistance and increase strength and endurance. Those very same ropes could be used to tie me...