We came to an agreement, the duck and I.

As a lover I aim to please, and afterwards I aim at the toilet. Sometimes I miss, but no matter what, you’ll always receive splatters of intimacy.

Perv.”He pointed to himself. “Male and eighteen. What’s your point?

doplní Nick.

Bella,leave the aggressive stuff to me.” My heart quirks in my chest. I may not like this guy but that sounded so hot. “Um…” Focus,focus. “What?

A rap at the back door made her jump, and she peered through the window for a long time before she eased open the door a crack. She left the security chain on. ‘What do...

Although we dealt decisively with all terrorist organizations, we at the same time not only maintained, preserved our democracy, but kept improving it.

I say, `Woe to them that have a nose, a real nose,and come to look round the torture-chamber! Aha, aha, aha!

The saga started out a normal day—don’t they all? I mean, surely one morning back there in prehistoric times a dinosaur woke up, yawned, chewed some coffee beans, and thought his day was going to...

When a boy’s first romantic interlude is with Pheobe the Dog-Faced Girl, he feels a need to get out into the world and find a new life.

Love is an intense flickable mystery, like a booger.

Far be it from me to slow down two badass supermodels on a mission, but we have a problem,” a male voice said wryly.I could see Christian out of the corner of my eye as...

Do you remember our first kiss? I do. Not a day goes by I don’t think of the feel of that bicuspid against my tongue. It had such a distinctive feel, neither cuspid nor molar…but...

I’m not saying I’m not saying. I’m also not saying I’m in love, and I’m not not saying I’m in love.

I love iconoclasts. I love individuals. I love people that are true to themselves, whatever the cost.

Great, I can look forward to having a swiss cheese wardrobe.

Let me ask you something, in all the years that you have…undressed in front of a gentleman has he ever asked you to leave? Has he ever walked out and left? No? It’s because he...

I wouldn’t even get elected. I’d probably deck a couple of people, too which would not play very well with the national media.

There’s a reason caveman started to develop sophisticated tools before the meteor wiped them all out: It’s so they could fucking shave. Do you know how frustrating it must have been to be hunched over...

Really, it’s amazing. You are his other half, Alexandria, You are fated to be with him. You belong to him.”It felt like something sat heavy on my chest. “Oh.Oh.No.”Seth frowned at me. “You don’t have...

I don’t know who the hell Paul Lynde is, or why he’s funny, and I prefer it to be a mystery to me.

Would you like a name of a good doctor who will schedule your little snip-snip operation?”she bit out.

All mothers are slightly insane.

My kitchen is not a place to live in. I made it white so I can tell instantly if it’s not clean-and I like it clean enough to be able to eat off the floors-or...

Sylph and Jodi return to my side, each carrying a cloth sack full of chickweed. I wrap my arm around Sylph’s waist and give her a quick squeeze. “Lesson’s over for today. I have something...

Some mornings it just doesn’t seem worth it to gnaw through the leather straps.

No matter what your heartache may be, laughing helps you forget it for a few seconds.

I had a dream about you. You were you, but you were many—a multitude of mannequins, each named Manny. And I was me, but I was Dark Jar Tin Zoo, and as such I made...

Nobody peels a banana before stabbing themselves with it. But that’s exactly how I love—dangerously.

I came from a real tough neighborhood. Once a guy pulled a knife on me. I knew he wasn’t a professional, the knife had butter on it.

Democracy was supposed to champion freedom of speech, and yet the simple rules of table decorum could clamp down on the rights their forefathers had fought and died for.

I’ve taken care of it,” I saidMy father looked at me, shocked.Then I realized “taken care of” had a very specific meaning in his line of work.”No, no, I mean he’s gone.

I can do this, I lied to myself feebly. No one was going to bite me.

Coveralls,” I reply, and I know I’m no longer screening what’s coming out of my mouth.He raises a eyebrow, amused yet again. “You wouldn’t want to ruin your clothing.” I gesture vaguely in the direction...

When I die, I want them to bury me facedown and ass up so that the whole world can kiss my ass!

Do you even realize how happythe average teenage girl would be in your shoes? I have a credit card. We’reat the mall. I want to buy you things. It’s like adolescent nirvana.”- Cora

Is he following? Can you have a flaming gay moment or something and check?””Why do I have to be the flaming gay one?

Again Creb grunted. It was the usual noncommittal comment used by men when responding to a woman. It carried only enough meaning to indicate the woman had been understood, without acknowledging too much significance in...

There really is no sense in pretending to be normal. Just be you because the moment you do, weirder things happen. Crazy comes back into fashion and every woman has to go out and find...

I make love with a focus and intensity that most people reserve for sleep.

Though everyone in the bar knew who he was, no one asked him about the death, though one old man did rustle his newspaper suggestively.

People who didn’t need people needed people around to know that they were the kind of people who didn’t need people.

He does manage the bookstore, which is currently my favorite place on earth.” Her eyes glazed over. “All those books. If I married him, I could probably work there the rest of my life. Nothing...

A brick could be used to stop people from reading my book. Just place the brick on the book’s cover, to discourage people from opening it up.

I don’t get very involved in the L.A. scene. When you do get invited out, you are expected to be on all the time. It’s just wearying.

I don’t suppose you would consider peaceful surrender?

Every child needs a father. Even if he turns out to be Darth Vader.

It wasn’t enough that I had to worry about playing well and winning the game, but I also had to deal with possibility that one of my teammates could be dragged off the field by...

Being fed, and having a soft bed, and other people being in charge, seemed the most wonderful prospect in the world at that moment.

This one’s for Alaska Young!