breaking your heart” a new meaning.

A brick could be used to help you write the book you’ve always wanted to write. That is, if you wanted to write a book on masonry with a target market of two—your parents.

I’ll bet opening a store called Boobs and Books would increase literacy. I prefer a hands-on approach to learning.

I’m looking for a man” Bree started.”Aren’t we all, dear? All I got’s bread and doughnuts, but they’re the next best thing””I don’t know about that .. well maybe doughnuts. I’ve lost my .. friend....

Never make a person feel, that he/she is very (extra) special.. Cause, then that person starts feeling that ‘You’ are not worth him/her.

. . . mixing defensiveness with anger – a wonderful mix, by the way.

Adding kidney beans to his cottage cheese and pineapple was an act of bravery Dave had not intended.

Looking back, retrospectively on the events of that evening, I can see the irony — the shrink whose cat ate his own tail. At the time of the incident, however, humor was not in my...

Egg has the truth of it. Aerion’s quite the monster. He thinks he’s a dragon in human form, you know. That’s why he was so wroth at that puppet show. A pity he wasn’t born...

The idealist hopes. The romantic sees doom. The postmodernist sees doom and hopes.

Hello, my name is Jaako and I am an addict. I am addicted to reading.

Even those fortunate ones among us who get sex right don’t necessarily feel compelled to talk about it. For all they know, everybody else is having the same experience. Sex being a naturally private act,...

Yes, men are pigs. Except your brother, of course. He’s actually a decent human being. Almost a woman.-Jillian’s mother

It is not the destination where you end up but the mishaps and memories you create along the way!

A blanket could be used to fill the night sky with smoke, if you use it to suffocate the fire. And if you mess it up, I’ll use my hands to suffocate you.

Ah ha!” the Doc screeched suddenly, wheeling around. “The salicylic acid! Maybe it SHOULD have been heated first!

Where does love reveal itself? In beds, sofas, bathtubs – each section of a department store has its advantages.

If I asked God to see into the future 50 years, and I couldn’t see myself, I wouldn’t assume I was dead. No, I’d assume I was simply hiding.

A brick is a biographical film in which a young orphan brick from the wrong side of the track grows up to be one of the most important bricks in all brick kind, as it...

I’ve done this sort of thing before. Not prophecies so much, but you’d be surprised how many people want to realign their ancestral lines to seem nobler, or rewrite their family history to remove more...

That’s it? That’s all that happens after you topple from grace? We lose our rubies and rations?” Marshall smirked. “Woe is me.

A brick could be used to attract a potential life partner. Yes indeed, and it’s how I met my ex wife. And the only reason she didn’t become my life partner was because I outlived...

Free pyramids! Buy one, get one half buried.

If the facts don’t fit the theory, change the facts.

Justin, honey, you were my very first kiss. My very first hand to hold. But you were nothing more than an average guy. And I don’t say that to be mean- I don’t. There was...

Fettucini alfredo is macaroni and cheese for adults.

I’m not sure who invented dodgeball, but I can almost guarantee you that it wasn’t the shortest kid in the class.

Be kind to dragons, for thou art crunchy when toasted and taste good with ketchup. (Sebastian)

In less than a year, the Bush administration will strut out of office, leaving the country in roughly the same condition a toddler leaves a diaper.

Clearly it’s not all that pacific on the Pacific Ocean

When I was young I found out that the big toe always ends up making a hole in a sock.So I stopped wearing socks.

Are you any good at it?””Pulling idiots out of the snow? I’m the best.

Marriage is not a process for prolonging the life of love, sir. It merely mummifies its corpse.

Oh, look at that, he’s heard of me. My fame grows.

I think we’re too young to be dating. I mean I don’t see what the rush is.” Summer says. “Yeah, I agree,” said August. “Which is kind of a shame, you know what with all...

I continued toward Atlanta with a Merle Haggard C.D. playing on the stereo. They weren’t great hosts, but those guys in The Ted Kaczynski Fan Club had great taste in music. It was all classic...

I had a dream I bought a popcorn maker that would pop pennies into cornuts, so I bought stock in corn wow was I nuts. That’s what my therapist said. He is just plain nuts...

Show me a girl with her feet planted firmly on the ground and I’ll show you a girl who can’t put her pants on.-Annik Marchand

I’m as much a lover as a cumulous cloud is a beard of God. My mustache can’t make rain the way I make love.

I tossed my shoulders and swaggered away, whistling with pleasure. In the gutter I saw a long cigaret butt. I picked it up without shame, lit it as I stood with one foot in the...

Evelyn: There’s nothing wrong with embracing one’s emotions.Brittany: Mom, You don’t just embrace your emotions, you make love to them hard-core.

Um, uh, gah.

I believe in evolution in the sense that a short-tempered man is the successor of a crybaby.

Women won’t sleep with me for the same reason that I don’t pay for sex—I don’t have any money. And if I did have money, I wouldn’t pay for sex, because women would sleep with...

I am the illegal alien of commentary. I will do the jokes that no one else will do.

Not only did I not win the sweepstakes, but I didn’t even bother to enter. I feel discriminated against.

I suppose half the time Shakespeare just shoved down anything that came into his head.

No. In fact, he was hard to shake. He, uh, stalked me, that kind of thing. I had to pretend he didn’texist.”Nicolai kissed her temple and relaxed against her.

The first time you see something that you have never seen before, you almost always know right away if you should eat it or run away from it.

What’s on the inside, beneath that sugar? Is it a bug? Is it a booger?