I blame boobs.

What lies between where you are and where you want to be sometimes requires traveling through the Twilight Zone.

I didn’t see myself as the busty type. Too bad bodies are issued randomly, not selected to match your personality

I always hear parents talking about how outraged they are because their kid saw a boob or something like that on TV. I never hear anyone say that they’re outraged because a cartoon character in...

I’ll bet opening a store called Boobs and Books would increase literacy. I prefer a hands-on approach to learning.

Uhh… people?

If I owned a t-shirt shop, I would honor Eli Whitney by putting his face on a t-shirt made from 100% cotton. FREE admission if you’re topless.

How stupid that all I have to dois grow two squishy lumps and suddenlyI’m man’s best friend

You were with Margo Roth Spiegelman last night? At THREE A.M.? I nodded. Alone? I nodded. Oh my God, if you hooked up with her, you have to tell me every single thing that happened....

Girls have got balls. They’re just a little higher up, that’s all.

It wasn’t just her beauty. It was the attitude in her smile, the tilt of her head, and the loving look in her eyes when she caught me sneaking a peek down her shirt.