A fine young man and a fine young felly he always was, except that in the old days, before you began coming in here, Mr. Witherwax, he maybe had too much money and spent too...

When reality and your dreams collide, typically it’s just your alarm clock going off.

Love burns. Whiskey burns. George Burns. What do all three have in common? They’re all dead to me.

Now is the time to drink!

I asked for a small drink, but he didn’t ask me what cup size. What, will a small not fit in a large?

Coffee has a way of waking my soul, much like drinking liquid heaven would.

Whenever the devil harasses you, seek the company of men or drink more, or joke and talk nonsense, or do some other merry thing. Sometimes we must drink more, sport, recreate ourselves, and even sin...

One more drink and I’ll be under the host.

Kid, I’ve only known you two days and I’ve seen you plastered three times.” He shook his head. “A bar would not be a good career move for you.

When a man is on the road to power he buys everyone a drink. Once elected he tries to close the saloons.

Well, I’ve kept you waiting long enough,” he said, peering at me from that distance which drinking adds between people and which, at odd turns in the evening, seems closeness itself.

Drinking is fun! It makes me feel horrible and sexy!

Imagine a delicious glass of summer iced tea.Take a long cool sip. Listen to the ice crackle and clink.Is the glass part full or part empty?Take another sip.And now?

To a drinker the sensation is real and pure and akin to something spiritual: you seek; in the bottle, you find.

How’s that a duel?””He who can still sing after the most drinks is winner. Plus, soon’ everyone is so drunk that they forget what argument was about.”Teft laughed. “Beats knives at dawn, I suppose.

If I have a near-beer, I’m near beer. And if I’m near beer, I’m close to tequila. And if I’m close to tequila, I’m adjacent to cocaine.

Drunken men give some of the best pep talks.

passing out,” a phrase that carries a distinct hint of judgment.

Here, drink your liqueur,” Henry said, tossing back her drink. “I carry it with me everywhere because it’s the only kind of drink that Leo doesn’t like, so there’s a chance I’ll still have some...

There was a kindliness about intoxication – there was that indescribable gloss and glamour it gave, like the memories of ephemeral and faded evenings.

On the other side of the ledger stood the fact that fotitude was useless against it (liquor). Even the mightiest potsman, a paladin who could match tankards with a whole alehouse of swag-bellies Falstaffs and...

Your fork is my shovel. I eat real estate and I drink coffee.

Nothing is more fun than fucking and drinking, I don’t know what is your God offering in heaven.

My voice falls into Southern drawl when I am tired, drunk, or in trouble. Too often, my accent is attacked by all three of these realities.

Imagine the big rating agencies as three competitive saloons standing side by side, with each free to set its own drinking age. Before long, nine-year-olds would be downing bourbon

you never know u r drunk until u wake up with a dickhead in the morning.

Now tequila may be the favored beverage of outlaws but that doesn’t mean it gives them preferential treatment. In fact, tequila probably has betrayed as many outlaws as has the central nervous system and dissatisfied...

A weekend in Vegas without gambling and drinking is just like being a born-again Christian.

I needed a vacation. I needed 5 women. I needed to get the wax out of my ears. My car needed an oil change. I’d failed to file my damned income tax. One of the...

Thank god for Vegas. Seriously.A lobotomy wasn’t as effective as a weekend three hours of Red Bull away (from LA, not Pismo) where I wore the thinnest pinned stilettos, gambled like a sweaty degenerate mobster...

They should make cell phones that are dishwasher safe. My cup runneth over—especially since both our drinks are in one glass because I’m too lazy to load the shotgun.

Snow is not microwave friendly. In fact, snow is not too friendly at all, unless you first buy it a few beers. Then it’s just downright slutty.

but does it have a winning taste? I’d hardly call silver a champion flavor. No, I’ll stick to my red wine.

I didn’t chug the hairspray because I’m an alcoholic. I drank it to style my throat hairs.

It’s the hardest fucking thing. It’s why we drink and do drugs and fight. It’s why I play music and build engines.

But in the daytime it was all right. And when you’d had a drink you knew it was the best way to live in the world because anything might happen. I don’t know how people...

In Irena’s head the alcohol plays a double role: it frees her fantasy, encourages her boldness, makes her sensual, and at the same time it dims her memory. She makes love wildly, lasciviously, and at...

Could I have a Sloe Gin Fizz, without the gin?””What’s the point of that, Miss?” the waiter said.”Tomorrow morning,” Mabel said.

I’ve never understood people who just go out for one drink. Once I have one drink, I want all the drinks.

Not having any drink about ain’t the same as not understanding the need for one. Times like these change a body’s perspective.

We drink to those who love us, we drink to those who don’t. We drink to those who fuck us, and fuck those who don’t!

I thought such awful thoughts that I cannot even say them out loud because they would make Jesus want to drink gin straight out of the cat dish.

Two things a man can’t hide; that he is drunk and that he is in love.

Need ‘nether whiskey. Whiskey chaser. Gotta get two men drunk.’Mr. Cohan placed both hands on the bar. ‘Mr. Walsh,’ he said severely, ‘in Gavagan’s we will serve a man a drink to wet his whistle,...

I decide to order wine, despite the fact that I don’t like it. But just because I don’t enjoy it is no reason for me not to not enjoy it. I’m romantic like that, I...

Two wives despaired of him,’ he said. ‘When he got engaged to Sylvia, she made it a condition that he should take the cure at Zurich. And it worked. He came back in three months...

The fruit of youth or of the grape, the transitory magic of the brief passage from darkness to darkness – the old illusion that truth and beauty were in some way entwined.

To every party, I bring my own booze. No need to help me carry it, as I walk in with it already in my bloodstream.

It’s nice to watch television but it’s even nicer when you’ve got a drink in your hand,’ Gregory Ratcliffe, a Birmingham shopkeeper, told Reynolds News. ‘Makes it more intimate somehow. Gives you the feeling that...

An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools.