I needed a vacation. I needed 5 women. I needed to get the wax out of my ears. My car needed an oil change. I’d failed to file my damned income tax. One of the...

Thank god for Vegas. Seriously.A lobotomy wasn’t as effective as a weekend three hours of Red Bull away (from LA, not Pismo) where I wore the thinnest pinned stilettos, gambled like a sweaty degenerate mobster...

They should make cell phones that are dishwasher safe. My cup runneth over—especially since both our drinks are in one glass because I’m too lazy to load the shotgun.

Snow is not microwave friendly. In fact, snow is not too friendly at all, unless you first buy it a few beers. Then it’s just downright slutty.

but does it have a winning taste? I’d hardly call silver a champion flavor. No, I’ll stick to my red wine.

I didn’t chug the hairspray because I’m an alcoholic. I drank it to style my throat hairs.

It’s the hardest fucking thing. It’s why we drink and do drugs and fight. It’s why I play music and build engines.

But in the daytime it was all right. And when you’d had a drink you knew it was the best way to live in the world because anything might happen. I don’t know how people...

In Irena’s head the alcohol plays a double role: it frees her fantasy, encourages her boldness, makes her sensual, and at the same time it dims her memory. She makes love wildly, lasciviously, and at...

My voice falls into Southern drawl when I am tired, drunk, or in trouble. Too often, my accent is attacked by all three of these realities.

Imagine the big rating agencies as three competitive saloons standing side by side, with each free to set its own drinking age. Before long, nine-year-olds would be downing bourbon

you never know u r drunk until u wake up with a dickhead in the morning.

Now tequila may be the favored beverage of outlaws but that doesn’t mean it gives them preferential treatment. In fact, tequila probably has betrayed as many outlaws as has the central nervous system and dissatisfied...

I thought such awful thoughts that I cannot even say them out loud because they would make Jesus want to drink gin straight out of the cat dish.

Two things a man can’t hide; that he is drunk and that he is in love.

Need ‘nether whiskey. Whiskey chaser. Gotta get two men drunk.’Mr. Cohan placed both hands on the bar. ‘Mr. Walsh,’ he said severely, ‘in Gavagan’s we will serve a man a drink to wet his whistle,...

I decide to order wine, despite the fact that I don’t like it. But just because I don’t enjoy it is no reason for me not to not enjoy it. I’m romantic like that, I...

Two wives despaired of him,’ he said. ‘When he got engaged to Sylvia, she made it a condition that he should take the cure at Zurich. And it worked. He came back in three months...

The fruit of youth or of the grape, the transitory magic of the brief passage from darkness to darkness – the old illusion that truth and beauty were in some way entwined.

To every party, I bring my own booze. No need to help me carry it, as I walk in with it already in my bloodstream.

It’s nice to watch television but it’s even nicer when you’ve got a drink in your hand,’ Gregory Ratcliffe, a Birmingham shopkeeper, told Reynolds News. ‘Makes it more intimate somehow. Gives you the feeling that...

An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools.

Glasses are for people that sips instead of drinks.

Could I have a Sloe Gin Fizz, without the gin?””What’s the point of that, Miss?” the waiter said.”Tomorrow morning,” Mabel said.

I’ve never understood people who just go out for one drink. Once I have one drink, I want all the drinks.

Not having any drink about ain’t the same as not understanding the need for one. Times like these change a body’s perspective.

We drink to those who love us, we drink to those who don’t. We drink to those who fuck us, and fuck those who don’t!

Passivity is corrosive to the soul; it feeds on feelings of integrity and pride, and it can be as tempting as a drug.

it does seemthe more we drinkthe better the wordsgo.

his lips drink water but his heart drinks wine

You know, that’s the trouble with drinking. Come the morning, you can never remember their names.

Alcohol makes you do some crazy things, like speak openly of your love, fornicate with strangers, and occasionally commit murder. That’s why I stopped drinking. Been sober now for over three days.

Drinking intensifies all your pressures and your needs.

So he was always in the town at one place or another, drinking, knocking about with the men he knew. It really wearied him. He talked to barmaids, to almost any woman, but there was...

My alarm went off. My sleep went on. Dreaming about coffee is not the same as drinking down coffee.

He stopped complaining, but now I was annoyed. I went to the roof and drank alone.

Wenn du mit einem Schweden um die Wette saufen willst, solltest du zumindest Finne oder Russe sein.(S. 148)

Ever heard the phrase, ‘candy is dandy but liquor is quicker?'”Great she wanted to get me drunk.”Ah…ever heard of underage!””Where there’s a will there’s a way,” she said, matter-of-factly.”That’s your great plan?

I’m more than a few neurons shy of a synapse right now, and it feels absolutely fan-fucking-tastic.

But I think that the most important thing was to really stop drinking.

Writer’s block is a fancy term made up by whiners so they can have an excuse to drink alcohol.

Death: ‘There are better things in the world than alcohol, Albert. Albert: ‘Oh, yes, sir. But alcohol sort of compensates for not getting them.’

The point of drinking in moderation is that sometimes you don’t drink in moderation.

Easy mistake to make,” Jem said.

I never drink while I’m working, but after a few glasses I get ideas that would never have occurred to me dead sober.

I like to see the glass as half full, hopefully of jack daniels.

I ordered a beer and then I ordered another beer, because why finish one when I can finish two? Having only one is great for love, but bad for beer.

I’m a competitor. I once placed fifth in a bottle of whiskey.

I drink screwdrivers because they help me unwind.

Right, what’s there possibly to worry about?” she said. “Just some surgery in the garage with a drunk doctor.”Little miss,” said Doc, pointing a finger at Cass. “I’m drinking. I’m not drunk. There’s a difference.”...