When people keep telling you that you can’t do a thing, you kind of like to try it.

Vampires do breathe, by the way, but their chests don’t move like humans’. Have you ever lain in the arms of your sweetheart and tried to match your breathing to his, or hers? You do...

Even on the most solemn occasions I got away without wearing socks and hid that lack of civilization in high boots

I often confuse fog and mist. But one is not the other any more than either are either. Let this be a lesson in love.

…I want to grab her collarbones as if they were handlebars.

A blanket could be used to trick a bull into charging at you. After you trick the bull, trick a bear next, and then by that time all the investors will be playing your game,...

A blanket could be used to understand Understanding. At least I think so. The process is complicated, and really hard to understand.

You’ve got some power,” Jakkin said. “One hug—and the lights go out!

Fish and visitors stink after three days.

Pray, v. To ask that the laws of the universe be annulled in behalf of a single petitioner, confessedly unworthy.

There’s lots of love in Ocala. Must be something in the water. That’s probably why I have to pee so much.

I’ve already seen what you’ve got,” Liz said, completely out of patience. “Now gimme my wine.””It’s not that. I want to show you something at my place.”Do I have Idiot stamped on my forehead? They...

A brick could be an object to measure your life against. Are you square, rigid, and inflexible? If yes, are you in the military? If no, why are you acting like a brick?

A blanket is a shield, blocking out the breeze, and an insulator, keeping in body heat.

I spent hours yesterday talking of little but medical symptoms and insane asylums. And you listened as though it were poetry and all but swooned at my feet. It is too bad I don’t have...

In Life, you need to know the difference between what you think is right and what you know is right.

RADICALISM, n. The conservatism of to-morrow injected into the affairs of to-day.

I’d rather have a horse in a glass, because I’ll be just down the hall if you need me. My affection is fluid, so why won’t you let me love you?

I should never be left alone with my mind for too long.

Little Women,” what, is that about midgets? I freaking love midgets.

I need a bone saw—for the meatloaf I made for you, which looks suspiciously like a brick. The gravy is a blanket.

Babe!

Oliver laughed – actually laughed.”I like this new Claire,” he said. “You should work her this hard all the time, Myrnin. She’s interesting when she’s forthright.”Claire, possessed by the spirit of Eve, shot him the...

I don’t know what I’d do without you. There’s no one else to look after me. And it’s not just that. I sometimes think you’re the only person who really knows me. I only feel...

And the old man hugs him back and says, ‘Pinocchio?

As a journalist, I am compelled to know the answers.””As a girl, I am compelled to protect what’s left of my manicure,” Petra said.

I fish better than any fish alive.

After scolding one’s cat one looks into its face and is seized by the ugly suspicion that it understood every word. And has filed it for reference.

Conflict of interest. I wanted to date somebody who was less screwed up than me, and she wasn’t.

Better broke than dead.

Nearly everywhere I’ve been, popular wisdom has it that the location of humanity’s original planet is unknown, mysterious. In fact it isn’t, as anyone who troubles to read on the subject will discover, but it...

I am a man of peace [so he told Mother, but it always appeared to me that he was the most belligerent man of peace I had ever encountered]

Those who believe everything they read probably should refrain from reading.

A unicorn breathes rainbows like a dragon breathes fire. My coffee breathes Jarod Kintz quotes.

Never get old. It’s a ridiculously uncomfortable process Ath Creator should be made to find a cure for.

Yes, reason has been a part of organized religion, ever since two nudists took dietary advice from a talking snake.

…ducks and geese are foolish things, and must be looked after, but girls can take care of themselves.

Fine! I’ll throw on some clothes. Turn around. I’m in my pj’s””I’m a guy. That’s like asking a kid not to glance at the candy counter.

The satisfying sound of bone giving way, as well as his outraged cry, made the you-had-it-coming-asshole angles sing.

Man is an endangered species.

I don’t like hot coffee that’s cold, or iced coffee that’s hot. Or leftover love in a rusty thermos.

The ones who constantly make us laugh are the hardest of friends to know – for comedians are the caricatures among us.

I could not be a zombie. They had no thoughts. Their brains were gruel. They said little beyond “Brrr!” unable, even, to articulate completely what they sought.”Brains,”I said distinctly. “And I feel no burning urge...

He carried you out of the fire and is letting you visit us from the dead. Who else would have those privileges except his bride?

[Home Economics Textbook from 1950]: “Prepare yourself. Take fifteen minutes to rest so you’ll look refreshed when hubby comes home from work. Touch up makeup and put a ribbon in your hair. He’s just been...

The person, be it gentleman or lady, who has not pleasure in a good novel, must be intolerably stupid.

I can pull over,” he answers smartly.

Satire is the antidote to Pollyanna and Dr. Pangloss. It focuses our gaze sharply upon the the contrast between things as they are and as they should be.

Karo kann sehr gut schießen. Sie trifft nur nicht immer.

Because I trust in the ever-changing climate of the heart. (At least, today I feel that way.) I think it is necessary to have many experiences for the sake of feeling something; for the sake...