You see, sex for Jews is not such a terrible sin. It’s just one more physical sport we’re gonna stink at.

If sex were food, Rhage would have been morbidly obese.

As Luxenberg’s work has only recently been published we must await its scholarly assessment before we can pass any judgements. But if his analysis is correct then suicide bombers, or rather prospective martyrs, would do...

To me, the perfect date consists of dinner, dancing, and sex with a girl who has no stomach or legs, but does have an overactive sex drive.

That was not sex. That was naked poetry.

A love affair is like a short story–it has a beginning, a middle, and an end. The beginning was easy, the middle might drag, invaded by commonplace, but the end, instead of being decisive and...

A nation’s not a child, for God’s sake. … It’s like a wild horse you tame by breaking it. Or a fiery woman you slap till she sees sense and warms your bed.

… all his strength gathered in his hips and chest and his arms wrapped around me and his breath jabbed soft and hot in my ear and a note of tenderness was there at the...

I had a dream about you. You were trying to perfect the art of sexual intercourse, and I offered you the use of one of my statues to practice on. Artists have to stick together,...

I can read in bed all night long. I can watch movies all night long. And I can have sex for literally minutes.

The only thing better than being productive, is being reproductive.

Kevin Love has a last name that sums up my feelings for you. But then again, so does Renaldo Letsfucktonight.

My sex life is Ok. Specifically, Oklahoma City.

I don’t need a coffee cup. That’s what hands were invented for. That’s also why I don’t need sex.

Sexy is fine. So is OK.

I just cut my beard. I used a tractor, because farmers make the best lovers. But why sell produce when you could sell reproduce?

When her and I made love, I cried, out of loneliness.

I couldn’t be a doctor. I have no patience for patients, like I do silly puns. But I could be a barista, because I love coffee like I love sex—and that’s why I pay for...

Francis Bacon has the most delicious last name ever, followed closely by Johnny Scrambledeggs. I make love like those two guys make breakfast out of family reunions.

Much of the Kama Sutra is like origami; I don’t quite understand all the bending that needs to happen.

The here and the beyond are enough, but there were a few angels for whom it was not enough: who demanded a third dimension–who sought fusions, communes, who ate each other and created sex.

Life is like a dry handjob. Just when it starts getting good, it’s already over.

Nigromanta took him to her room, which was lighted with false candlesticks, to her folding cot with the bedding stained from bad loves, and to her body of a wild dog, hardened and without a...

She had originally agreed to appear naked, but on seeing the cars informed me that she would only appear topless—an interesting logic was at work there.

I considered sex work, but then I bent over and looked at my asshole in a mirror. Nobody was going to pay me for access to that thing.

Marriage is like a series of opposing reflections, inverse images getting ever smaller like nesting dolls, each one of your trying to squeeze yourself smaller to fit inside the hopes of the other, until one...

We have reason to believe that man first walked upright to free his hands for masturbation.

There’s more to sex, the really good kind, than orgasms.

Sex is not merely an entertainment; it is a courtesy and affability.

Huddled in her mink in the Kansas City airport, she had a vision of women writing about sex as openly as male writers, but quite, quite differently. Some women would treat sex much as men...

Father was about to leave the house with his camera on his way to call for Mrs Walsh. They were going to a nearby park where, he said, he was planning to take her on...

I shall now explain my plan. You may then speak, but only to amend the detail. The broad outline is not subject to negotiation. Are you ready? Good … I propose to have sex with...

When you’re having sex again, it makes you wonder why you weren’t before. What could possibly have been bad enough to make you stop doing THAT?

I know a lot about birds and bees, but I don’t know very much about the birds and the bees. Everything I do know I had to teach myself on the Internet, because I don’t...

He looked at her and tried to discover behind her lascivious expression the familiar features that he loved tenderly. It was as if he were looking at two images through the same lens, at two...

You’re the only one I’ve ever wanted, Alix, the only one I’ll ever want. That’s a promise.

His jeans, soft against her legs, made her realize that twice tonight they’d done the deed with him more dressed than not. She liked such desperation in a man.

I sat on the bed. Neither of us said anything. I wasn’t slick and sophisticated enough for this. What do you say to boyfriend A when he finds you naked in the bed of boyfriend...

By 1975 sexual feeling and marriage will have nothing to do with each other.

Sex should be edible, or not at all.

Elise hid her face in his shoulder, embarassed, “Kane! What will they think?” She whispered against his neck.”That we’re newly bonded and I can’t keep my hands off of my lovely mate.” And sure enough,...

Hormones are nature’s three bottles of beer.

Seriously, it’s like watching mild porn, watching you two eye fuck each other every two seconds.

Guys who would make fun of girls for sexual inexperience are terrible people, and when girls do it to other girls it feels even shittier. Guys who shame girls who haven’t had sex want them...

It’s a way of talking about lust without talking about lust, he told them. It is a way of talking about sex, and fear of sex, and death, and fear of death, and what else...

I have found there to be little distance between the unlatching of a chain and the spreading of a woman’s legs. As if they can never unbar only a single entrance. It’s a disease called...

You know what I used to dream about, in stir?” His voice was hoarse, the words low and fast and faintly guttural. “I used to dream about you. You were the only clean and good...

I’ve been left alone, even by the paparazzi, because what sells is sex and scandal. Absent that, they really don’t have much interest in you. I’m still married, still working, still happy.

Until recently the locus of sexual fantasy was peopled with images actually glimpsed or were sensations actually felt, or private imaginings taken from suggestions in the real world, a dream well where weightless images from...

Did you think I’d only want you once? Oh, my, you are more naïve than I thought. Why would I go through so much trouble for a mere tryst? Does a man ride a stallion...