I’m a lion in a strange land.

You say freak, I say unique.

33 old people went into a nursing home, and only 34 people came out alive. One old woman died while giving birth to twins.

When I smell small, my nose gets clogged up. Think what would happen if I whiffed medium or large.

Bye,” but to me it means food. Of the greetings, goodbye is the desert.

My love for you would blot out the sun like a cloud made out of yogurt. I hope you brought a spoon.

More I get to know people, the more I tend to end up odd.

I restrain myself from following orders—especially restraining orders. I’d like to remind my dad that my love is longer than 500 feet.

If I had a funny thought and a runny nose, but only had one napkin and no paper, I’d rather use that napkin to write on than blow my nose. After all, that’s what sleeves...

Saintliness is very odd. When people encounter it, they often take it for something else, something completely unlike it: indifference, mockery, scheming, coldness, insolence, perhaps even contempt. But they’re mistaken, and that makes them furious....

I was nervous. Like an ice cube, I just froze up. Then I melted in some strange guy’s drink.

If someone invented a thermometer that measured weirdness, it would probably melt under my tongue.

If what you create seems to turn out much stranger than who you are as a person, it’s probably because your heart is talking.

I’m 30-years-old, and I still can’t get out from under my father’s shadow. He’s really tall, so maybe I’ll just ask him to move over a few feet.

When you are convinced that what you offer is yours, whether it be mediocre or of standard quality, your originality will make people love you in a way you did not expect.

I always wear roller skates when I ride my bicycle. The more wheels the better, and that’s what makes me a better lover. You know you want to go for a spin. I’ll bring the...

Who is this guy taking care of my oral hygiene?

Every villain is a hero in his own mind.

My love is like the shape your mouth makes while you whistle. Would you mind if I accompanied you on my harmonica?

She may have been among them but she could never be one of them. She was without inclusion for-as-much as she was not “one of the girls” and she wasn’t “one of the guys.” She...

An anomaly has his own ambitions. You can try reasoning with him, but that’s like using money to bribe a beast.

On savings: A dollar here, a dollar there. Over time, it adds up to two dollars.

You don’t get explanations in real life. You just get moments that are absolutely, utterly, inexplicably odd.

Don’t try to hog loneliness and keep it all to yourself. Share it with a special someone.

For now. But if I ever decide you’re useless, you are a dead man.”To be killed by you is to be desired more than a life excluded from your service.”Bravo.” Her Imperial Viciousness laughed with...

People can waste a large amount of their time trying to be accepted by people. Sometimes, God meant for you not to fit. You never know, you may hold the unique perspective that when voiced...

Falling in love too quickly spells disaster. But I’ve always lived dangerously, and I spell disaster with a Z.

As an Odd-Fish, it is not my job to be right,’ said Sir Oort. ‘It is my job to be wrong in new and exciting ways.

My armpits are not only rank, but they’re ranked number one in customer satisfaction. Try them for free or your money back.

I am the odd man out in the family.

I loved her as long as a midget. It was gruesome, and then I grew some.

I am attracted to certain types of people: the outrageous, outstanding and the one’s pegged as odd. The 3 O’s remind me not to be ordinary.

I’ll be your Dostoevsky, if you’ll be my Tolstoy. Our life together will be so full of despair that death will be like a gulag full of joy.

There was an infinitesimal pause while he watched her face, as though he half expected her to recognise it, before he went on, ‘My friends call me Thorn,’ and gave her a smile of such...

Creative people are often found either disagreeable or intimidating by mediocrities.

I told the waitress I wanted some coffee. She asked if I wanted leaded of unleaded, so I had to leave the restaurant, because I quit drinking gasoline years ago.

No other foreskin could have caused such trouble.

Love knows no boundaries. I wish I would have known that before I hired a cartographer to map out my romantic territory.

My ashtray is full, the carton of cigarettes is empty, and I just cremated grandpa. But I never inhaled—or told him I loved him.

There’s truth and honor in a mustache. And that’s why I started flying one on the flagpole outside of my house.

He never once tells me what Tiffany thinks or what is going on in her heart: the awful feelings, the conflicting impulses, the needs, the desperation, everything that makes her different from Ronnie and Veronica,...

It was queer meeting him there—odd I mean—and what are the odds we’d meet at a gay bar? I was there to meet a woman, I think.

If you’re going to hold a grudge, at least put on an oven mitt before you pick it up.

Stab me if you can enjoy it – but not if it feels like a duty. Stab me vertically if I’m lying down and horizontally if I’m running

She says he says, but she could be lying to me, and he could be lying to her, so I can’t believe her, even if I could believe her.

It must be an odd person indeed that can say for certain they are normal.

Christopher throws dandelion head after dandelion head into his bag. It’s getting heavy now and his fingers are stained from the work but there are still so many left to kill. His biggest mistake is...

When the clock reads 3:00, I don’t call it three o’clock, I call it three hundred, and I remember the Spartans. At 3:01, however, I remember what I was doing at 2:59, and I get...

…only think a moment that we are here now, and that that was then, and it has come to this, and how odd, odd, odd it is!

…Tell me, has anything odd happened to you recently?What do you mean, odd?’Unusual. Deviating from the customary. Something outside the usual parameters of normalcy. An occurrence of unprecedented weird.