You called her Kitten? And she let you? She put me in a coma for three days when Icalled her that! My balls never recovered from her smashing them into my spine!

…that left Francesca to slink into the chair opposite us. My feeling of superiority was short-lived, however, when she settled herself down and then crossed her legs.I didn’t need a mirror to know my whole...

Is that vodka?’ Margarita asked weakly. The cat jumped up from its chair in indignation. ‘Excuse me, your majesty,’ he squeaked, ‘do you think I would give vodka to a lady? That is pure spirit!

The ideal of calm exists in a sitting cat.

We can’t find the cat,We don’t know where she’s at,Oh, where did she go?Does anyone know?Let’s ask this walking hat.

Only a cat can seem well-traveled without ever leaving home.

We had five goats, two dogs, a cat and racks of commentaries on Shakespeare.

I am the All Three Cats of love, and if you had to choose, you’d be wise to pick the middle one.

I am the perfect snuggling companion. Ask any cat.

She looked so sexy with her sixteen cats that I just had to swipe right, but when she messaged me first quoting Monty Python, I knew it was Tinder love. Maybe on the first date...

And there is my payment the rubies in your cheeks. Are you properly scandalized by your wicked behavior? If you were Catholic, you’d singe the ears of the priest you confessed to. Do you remember...

I was seeing if Dermot understood sign language, but from the look on his face, it seems not.

There were place cards at the head table, which was one long, rectangular thing that would have everyone facing the reception room. I sat at the one marked Chritine Russell. Randy say to my left,...

a woman in furs is nothing more than a large cat, a charged electric battery?

…today there are bars of light on the rug, but Muse Cat prefers his tomato box where he can dream in private…

But—let me tell you my cat joke. It’s very short and simple. A hostess is giving a dinner party and she’s got a lovely five-pound T-bone steak sitting on the sideboard in the kitchen waiting...

please” anyone but themselves

The cat’s out of the bag” tells that a secret’s been exposed to the world. But who put the secret, or cat, in the bag in the first place? I thought only kidnap victims were...

My cat’s name is Mr. Dog, and My penis’ name is Mr. Beaver. Ah, but that’s life, no?

Love is a cat wearing a fur coat in a sauna in the middle of the Sahara Desert at noon. Trust me, I speak from personal experience.

The lustful glances thrown his way made me wish he wasn’t such a damned bowl of eye candy.”- Cat re: Bones

Even without being believed, magic can change things. It moves invisibly through the air, dissolving the usual ways of seeing, allowing new ways to creep in, secretly, quietly, like a stray cat sliding thought the...

Sleep in my arms like a little cat; I love your snoring and your smell.

Wait a minute. Wait just a hairball kakking minute.

Colorful characters are the odd shaped pieces that fill the holes in life’s puzzle.

When I played in the sandbox, the cat kept covering me up.

The big one I missed out on was ‘Cat on a Hot Tin Roof.’ MGM wanted me for it, and Warner Bros. wouldn’t give me permission to do it.

After scolding one’s cat one looks into its face and is seized by the ugly suspicion that it understood every word. And has filed it for reference.

Maybe I could hear better if my ears weren’t flipped inside out. Unlike a cat’s ears, you can’t tell mine are flipped over. But they must be, because I only seem to listen to myself.

A cat purring on your lap while you sip hot tea, is there anything better? Oh, and you’re floating in a zero gravity environment.

The gremlin stopped, blinking up at me with an almost hurt expression. ‘Master punish bad kitty?’ he said in a pitiful voice.’No I’m not going to punish the bad kitty,’ I said and Grimalkin snorted.’And...

Where are you, bloodsuckers? Here, fangy, fangy, fangy…

I am thirsty, and very susceptible to flattery… you could talk me into anything…””So much for fighting the good fight,” I observed dryly. “He’ll have a harem within a week.”Bones watched Juan disappear down the...

I know I’m a bad bargain. But I’m begging you to have me anyway. Because I want a chance to make you as happy as you make me. I want to build a life with...

You smell like a litter box.

I had a dream about you. I was a cat. You were a red dot. And even those times I caught you, we couldn’t touch. But still I chased you anyway.

how can you love a little catso muchin such ashortshorttime?

There are tales that rise like the early sun, breathe, and take on a life of their own. There are ones that flow quietly and effortlessly until time forsakes them, but there are others that...

The way my vacuum cleaner sucks up cat hair, I shouldn’t have been surprised when it huffed up my mustache. But I was surprised it sucked out all the love and romance in our relationship.

I smell like cat snuggles and sex, though from two different activities. I have just perfected my meatloaf-flavored ice cream, if you want to grab a spork.

And that beautiful face is going to be clamped between my legs as soon as we get home, don’t you worry.

You treat me as if I was a feeble Human who couldn’t survive without your help, but I am a MASTER bloody VAMPIRE. (Bones to Cat – Ch 16, pg. 174)

My queen, his thoughts said reverently.My ass, I didn’t reply out loud.

She had wrapped her marble-like body in a huge fur, and rolled herself up trembling like a cat.

Of course the Man was wild too. He was dreadfully wild. He didn’t even begin to be tame till he met the Woman, and she told him that she did not like living in his...

Damn fine ship’s cat you are.

Victor had always said that most of the time happiness crept up on you when you were doing something else. He also said no happiness was ever wasted, because every happiness stays with you, and...

I was so offended I wanted to light his face on fire. But I restrained myself, because he was wearing my cat on his head.

I feel self-conscious calling my cat fat in front of a fat person, considering I’m skinny and inconsiderate.

I want to start a business making mint-flavored sunshine that comes in a can half full of meow-free rainbows. (Leprechauns sold separately.)