Slowly, he lifts the flashlight. Her shorts are torn and frayed, her shirt ripped from chest to naval, exposing her black bra and dirty stomach. And then he raises the light so it reflects off...

I just don’t understand why anyone would want to get their caffeine in a less-efficient form.

Run, sweetheart, run.

Blood is really warm,it’s like drinking hot chocolatebut with more screaming.

I hate what’s become of the world. Most of the humans do. There’s so much violence and blood and meaningless death. It’s not even the normal kind of death where your heart stops beating and...

To me, the best zombie movies aren’t the splatter fests of gore and violence with goofy characters and tongue in cheek antics. Good zombie movies show us how messed up we are, they make us...

Self-pity NEVER leads to happiness. Avoid it like it’s a zombie plague.

Mom stood over the still thrashing ghost with the bat and brought it down on its head again and again. “Leave him alone, leave my family alone!” she screamed. “We are not going to die...

Cute kid. How many of those things do you think are out there?

Take it from an old cadaver. Let go of the past.

This is what my high school life had become—a horror show of epic, mind-fuck proportions.

Zombies are the middle children of the otherworldly family. Vampires are the oldest brother who gets to have a room in the attic, all tripped out with a disco ball and shag carpet. Werewolves are...

The sunken grave would fade away, probably in my lifetime. If I could avoid killer zombies for a few years. And vampires. And gun-toting humans. Oh, hell, the hot-spot would probably outlast me.

Time is like a zombie. It moves slow, but all of a sudden ‘BOO! Got your brains!

There were a few nighttime pedestrians on the block, but they continued on their way, dutifully ignoring the zombie vomiting blood out of the back of my car. Good old New Yorkers. They really couldn’t...

Zombies are eternal. They’re like dinosaurs.

I’m not an expert, I’m a survivor. I hope you can learn how to be one yourself.

Excuse me if I feel skeptical,’ I said. ‘Coach’s foot fell off. How exactly do you propose to cure that? Superglue?

A man’s principles are his own. Man starts flip-flopping on what he believes based on outside influences and he may as well run for congress.

Oh, hell, no. I’m insane, but that would be nuts.

He could wear hats. He could wear an assortment of hats of different shapes and styles. Boater hats, cowboy hats, bowler hats. The list went on. Pork-pie hats, bucket hats, trillbies and panamas. Top hats,...

Nice driving, ya doomed fucks!

There was something about clowns that was worse than zombies. (Or maybe something that was the same. When you see a zombie, you want to laugh at first. When you see a clown, most people...

…they come to us, these restless dead,Shrouds woven from the words of men,With trumpets sounding overhead(The walls of hope have grown so thinAnd all our vaunted innocenceHas withered in this endless frost)That promise little recompenseFor...

Our virus is a lot smarter than the ones you see in zombie movies. It doesn’t make its victims stagger around slobbering and moaning so anyone in their right minds would run the other way....

People need books like zombies need brains.

By now, we’re all familiar with the literary post-apocalyptic world’s metaphors. The zombies are our anxieties. The vampires are our greed. Our fairies are hope. Our werewolves are … what again? Something

Everything good or bad in my life had started and ended within the limits of that town. It was over now, though, and a new chapter was beginning. Nothing would ever be the same as...

Some of the men are zombies.

If they ever turn, let them chase me for a while. It’s always been afantasy of mine to be chased by zombie cheerleaders.

The toughest part about riding a horse is overcoming the urge to eat it.

The burning red taste of blood floods my mouth. The sparkle of life sprays out of his cells like citrus mist from an orange peel, and I suck it in.

Are you going to rape me at any point or anything?” I just figured it was good to get things out in the open, get myself in the right headspace. He whipped his head around...

A man. A dead man. A dead man with no arms.

He first noticed it on the plane ride. There was an odor about her and it was becoming more pronounced with each passing hour. It was like the smell of rotting meat.

Alice is fictional. This isn’t.

We are in the middle of what looks increasingly like the zombie apocalypse. Moaning people don’t need help. Moaning people are intending to eat us.

You know what would be awesome? . . . If I could have a machete.

Beth from accountingis just sitting in her careating spaghetti.

A father’s only dream is to hear his daughter ask to kill some zombies. Go for it, sweetie. Make this old man proud.

Mother Fuckers. They’re going to feel pretty stupid when they find out.They’re fucking with the wrong people.

If I had a dime for every time I heard someone say that they’re tired of a genre (zombies) because it’s only a fad, I’d be rich. #DeadRising

This is the way the world ends; not with a bang or a whimper, but with zombies breaking down the back door.

I turned on Fox News and jumped when I saw that they had one of those things in their studio. “Are you people crazy?” I screamed at the television. “Get out of there. Somebody shoot...

You had me at ‘blood allergy.

Even as zombies, ridiculous prom gowns were the downfall of teenage girls, crippling them at the knees.

We always kept in our hearts the most noble, beautiful feeling that sets human beings apart: hope.

Often, a school is your best bet-perhaps not for education but certainly for protection from an undead attack.

Studying wine taught me that there was a very big difference between soil and dirt: dirt is to soul what zombies are to humans. Soil is full of life, while dirt is devoid of it.

Maybe they’re not as mindless as we thought, or so dedicated to turning every last human into one of them. Like Kalyn says, they were just bored, waiting for something better to happen.And that better...