A blank cheque kills creativity.

When ready to settle down: women are more interested in where the man is going; men are more interested in where the woman has been.

To fail, try to please your critics. To please your critics, try to fail.

To be enslaved then, you needed to be ignorant. To be enslaved today, you need to be knowledgeable.

Marriage is the commodification of affection, copulation, and, reproduction.

Public opinion is to an unconventional idea … what abortion is to sperm.

If we really exist merely to fulfill God’s plan: then life is a television drama; with God being the scriptwriter, the director, and, the audience.

Feminists who accept the claim made in The Book of Genesis, and, that God is a he, need to make their minds up.

Generally, people need less than a quarter of what they want.

We seldom look like the way we look like when people we like are looking.

Back then: to be regarded as well-known, one had to be great. Today: to be regarded as great, one has to be well-known.

Free is he who is reputable for not being fearful of losing his reputation.

88% of women love making their first love making incident with a man seem like an accident.

Your friends love you for who you are. Your family loves you for what you are.

A rumor is usually a lie that the media can legally profit from.

Rich men use most of their money to get richer. Poor men use most of their money to look richer.

The garden is an unemployed township-based man’s cubicle.

When the going gets tough: the poor close their eyes, the rich open their wallets.

An ‘Employee of the Month’ is a titled given to someone who best helped someone else actualize their dream—in that particular month.

Being a philosopher requires a lot of thinking and no action. Being a model requires a lot of action and no thinking.

Science gave us forensics. Law gave us crime.

Love songs are nothing without exaggeration.

Don’t obsess over having the ‘latest’ version of a product. For there was a time that the previous version was the latest.

Life punishes those who have things in abundance by making them worry about petty things like: what to wear, or, which car to drive.

If human beings weren’t ‘dumbable’ enough to be made soldiers, war would be nothing but an exchange of swear words between a handful of individuals.

School programs the schooled to type a CV. Life inspires the unschooled to type a business plan.

Back then: to be paid more, one needed to increase the number of things that are by him known. Today: to be paid more, one needs to increase the number of people by whom he...

To be a better cook, cook more. To be a better writer, read more.

Two reasons why people hate and/or fight change: (1) People fear the unknown; and (2) There are always people profiting from how things are.

The boring thing with ‘No sex before marriage’ is that kids will never get to attend their parents’ wedding.

Reality is a hallucination shared by most sane men.

A man’s bank balance is the new penis size.

A ‘normal person’ is what is left after society has squeezed out all unconventional opinions and aspirations out of a human being.

Somebody is born. Somebody goes to school. Somebody learns to conform. Somebody types a CV. Somebody gets a job. Somebody follows orders. Somebody gets a golden watch. And then, eventually, Somebody dies. And, a Nobody...

For good health, watch what you eat. For a good head, watch what you watch.

In a society where women are truly equal to men, a kid bred by a theist mother and an atheist father is born an agnostic. In a patriarchal society, the kid is automatically an atheist.

For an entrepreneur: wealth invites fame. For a celebrity: fame invites wealth.

Once a woman goes over 25, she prioritizes ‘financial security’ in a potential lover. Love and good looks are just a bonus.

A face-lift is a woman’s attempt to lower the odds of the next person accurately guessing her age.

I am obsessed with not being obsessed with acquiring material things.

A model is an actor without a voice.

Eyes are a deaf man’s ears. Ears are a blind man’s eyes.

Man would rather be loved for what he has, than be hated for what he lacks.

Plagiarism is the fear of a blank page.

For the duration of his erection: To a horny man, all women are the most beautiful woman in the world.

As common as unplanned sex. As uncommon as a planned child.

A VIP area is nothing without not-so-important people.

Dating a wo/man with a child is adoption … without the paperwork.

Those who say that money can’t buy one love make it sound as if love can buy one money.

A fast car can make women ‘like’ a man; and a man ‘like’ women … fast.