always schedule your comeback.

The last time somebody pointed out that cowboys ride horses, not tricycles, I shot him. Of course, I waited until another gunslinger gunned him down, but nevertheless, I still shot him.

I hate when I’m at the grocery store and the person checking me out asks, “Paper or plastic?” It’s offensive. As if I’m going to sleep with her just because she has a clever pick...

Fine! He is being passive aggressive with me, and it’s gonna backfire; I’m gonna be active friendly.

Civilization begins with distillation

A fool is a person who guesses and gets it wrong, a clever man is one who guesses, regardless of time period, and gets it right

There was a time when skepticism was an act of rebellion. Since to a degree I both believe in evolution and have faith, I can only conclude that, as prophesied, to have faith will someday...

You promise?””I cross the place where my heart used to be and wish to be even more deader than I am now.

Thomas was sick of being accused of knowing things.

Some say you have only one shot in life, well if you get ammo, you can reload.

I thought we were celebrating being richer and cleverer than everyone else!

You may not be the person with high IQ, but you can be the person with highest hard work.

The self-centered man will always expect nothing but praise. He will hope and expect all incoming criticism to be mere self-projection from the critic because when you’re self-centered, self-projection is all you can imagine one...

A brick makes an excellent window cleaner, if you throw it hard enough. Before you know it, your window will look so clean you’d think it had been replaced with a new one.

Clever wives are mostly silent ,alert and pay equal attention to limiting the kind and degree of emotions of family which creates and destroy HOMES.

Appeasement was never a very clever policy, and it should not be our option today.

The first and last weakness of his life, before him again. For a moment he felt himself blinded by his own memories; his own remembrances of the wits and wiles of Marian Halcombe that would...

Think of something clever, witty or profound, keep it short and people may quote you.

I like to spoon after I fork.

If I had felt always as much as I do sometimes, life wouldn’t be bearable.

Later, they also found a camp of outlaws who, when offered the chance to join the rebel ranks, unsheathed their daggers and threatened to cut the three into tiny, bloody pieces and eat them for...

When you’re at the end of your rope, tie a knot and hold on

There are a lot of songs that would ostensibly be a good candidate for parody, yet I can’t think of a clever enough idea.

Whenever I think of something but can’t think of what it was I was thinking of, I can’t stop thinking until I think I’m thinking of it again. I think I think too much.

Please don’t arrest me.””Listen to me, I’m not going to arrest you, ok? I’m not a cop.””Are you sure?””Am I sure I’m not a cop? yes, I’m sure.””You could be undercover.

He forced himself forward trying to seem innocent without acting like someone who was guilty who was trying to act innocent.

Words simply mean what people think they mean when they say them.

To us — richer and cleverer than everyone else!

It’s an easy guess, why some get famous over night and not during the day.

The height of cleverness is in one’s ability to be very clever without seeming clever at all.

I was once in a battle trying to fight my way out when I realized it’s better to sneak out.

I don’t write like this in order to show how clever and well read I am–though I am rather clever and well read as a matter of fact.

Did we really come all that way?” She asked. “Time flies when you’re scared out of your mind.” He answered.

But I am a just man, even to my enemy—and I will acknowledge, beforehand, that they are cleverer brains than I thought them.

This is Nimrod, because of whose vile plan the world no longer speaks a single tongue.

I’m going to photograph every single person to enter and leave this tattoo parlour.” Finbar rolled his eyes. “And they’ll hate that, because people who get dragons drawn on their backs are normally so shy...

Your intelligence enhances your ability to think and recollect, dream and set realistic goals. Your stamina is built on your passion for progress and willingness to excel… When you have a great stamina, you can...

Caring means cultivating the skills of an active listener. That is easier said than done, as an anecdote about the extraordinary social skills of British politicianBenjamin Disraeli and his rival William Gladstone illustrates … The...

His father was an ass and he is an ass. I imagine sooner than I should like I shall be playing uncle to a litter of asses.

If my ‘mind’ don’t mind, I don’t mind.

I’ve come to the point where I never feel the need to stop and evaluate whether or not I am happy. I’m just ‘being’, and without question, by default, it works.

I have chiseled features. Look. Look how chiseled they are. And my teeth are at least as white as his. You seriously think he’s good-lookin’?””I do,” said Tanith.”Right,” Sanguine said and nodded. “I’m gonna kill...

I’m a natural salesman. I sold my soul to the devil. I’m so shrewd that I got pennies on the dollar for it. Ha! Wait, a buyer who gets pennies on the dollar is the...

The deepness of your mind produces the thickness of your thoughts.

Awards sell tickets, and they’re a clever publicity stunt.

Today I am amused, and I haven’t seen anyone yet.

As it ‘appens, I am Arthur’s right-hand man,” said Suzy. “Or left-hand girl, I can’t remember where I stood last time. Anyhow, me and Arthur is like two fingers of a gauntlet. Or at least...

A stick won’t stick to a wall, so why is it called a stick? Likewise, why aren’t love and ghost the same word? Both are dead and invisible.

I saw how greatly he suffered the requirement of being clever. It separated him from his soul, and it didn’t get him anything other than a living.

Oh,clever… what’s the use of that? Are they human beings?