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Dark-Humour  Quotes
SWAT? For me?” Still trembling, one hand clung to the ambulance gurney, the other held a massive sterilised cotton wool wad under my nose.”Tactical Support was busy. You got Dennis and Arlo,” said Harry, speed-reading...

—Morana Blue

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ChandleresqueContemporaryCrime
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The young woman’s perfect breast didn’t yield beneath the gentle pressure of two latexed fingers.”What’re you doing?” Professor Robert ‘Lithium Bob’ Beck frowned at me.”I don’t know. It’s what I did when I first saw...

—Morana Blue

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CrimeDark-HumourPsychological-Thriller
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The light and the stars guide my way.

—Lailah Gifty Akita

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Dark-HumourDarkness-And-LightLight
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However, for all his affection and loyalty towards the animal, the dog would soon be leaving him – they would both be present at a celebratory dinner when they reached the roof, he reflected with...

—J.G. Ballard

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BallardDark-HumorDark-Humour
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Knives are sharp, but are equally confusing.

—Nathan Hassall

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Dark-HumourFunnyNascent-Illusion
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All I said was that I thought it was a judgement from God that Blyth had first lost his leg and then had the replacement become the instrument of his downfall. All because of the...

—Iain Banks

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DarkDark-HumourFaith
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Do you suppose cannibals eat finger food?

—Johnny Corn

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CannibalismDark-HumorDark-Humour
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I knew today was gonna be bad, but I never got close to this

—Ian Ayris

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CrimeDark-Humour
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If the US is a human melting pot, then Eastern Europe is a scrap yard.

—Péter Zilahy

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Central-EuropeDark-HumourDictatorship
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Moreover, man carries in his heart the desire always to wield his scientific knowledge in service of the greater good. He would of course never use it for destructive purposes. Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! …

—Jacques Tardi

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Dark-HumorDark-HumourEvil
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It’s not easy to be God.

—Péter Zilahy

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Central-EuropeComing-Of-AgeDark-Humour
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My wife was saying to me just the other day how she’s noticed a spring in my step lately. That was because I thought you were gone forever.’ ‘I missed you too, Thurid.

—Derek Landy

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CleverDark-HumourFunny
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You will suffer, son of Hades!’ What else is new? Nico thought.

—Rick Riordan

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Dark-HumourHumourLife
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He liked murder. Murder and long walks had been two of his favorite things when he was younger.

—Derek Landy

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Dark-HumourForebodingFunny
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He looked at the silver pocketknife in his hand. An idea came to him – possibly the stupidest, craziest idea he’d had since he thought, Hey, I’ll get Percy to swim in the River Styx!...

—Rick Riordan

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Dark-HumourMemoryNico-Di-Angelo
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Everyone gets tortured these days. Skulduggery by Serpine, who then turned around and did that red right hand thing at you. Then Skulduggery was tortured again by the Faceless Ones. I figured it was my...

—Derek Landy

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Dark-HumourFunnyHilarious
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Apparently, we’re all in the frame,” I heard Harry murmur somewhere behind me. And I whirled back to him. Innate, irrational anger surged. Then stopped, dead – as I suddenly took in Handsome, Robert and...

—Morana Blue

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ChandleresqueContemporaryCrime
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