The best baby-sitters, of course, are the baby’s grandparents. You feel completely comfortable entrusting your baby to them for long periods, which is why most grandparents flee to Florida.

It’s important for us to explain to our nation that life is important. It’s not only life of babies, but it’s life of children living in, you know, the dark dungeons of the Internet.

Since I had the baby I can’t tolerate anything violent or sad, I saw the Matrix and I had my eyes closed through a lot of it, though I didn’t need to. I would peek,...

There are those wonderful moments of clarity in life when one is reminded how irreparably flawed we humans are. Once, when I was nineteen, on the subway in Boston I lost my balance slightly and...

When my friends began to have babies and I came to comprehend the heroic labor it takes to keep one alive, the constant exhausting tending of a being who can do nothing and demands everything,...

With all of these people walking around, someone could have just grabbed the baby and taken him away.

Babies are soft. Anyone looking at them can see the tender, fragile skin and know it for the rose-leaf softness that invites a finger’s touch. But when you live with them and love them, you...

We have a new puppy and that’s enough! Two babies and three dogs is enough.

The numbers are down here (in the United States) for HIV and AIDS babies, thank goodness, but it’s an epidemic there.

Such babies may be exposed to more health risks in later life.

If your baby has a toothache, you don’t shoot the baby.

HEARSE, n. Death’s baby-carriage.

I was much distressed by next door people who had twin babies and played the violin; but one of the twins died, and the other has eaten the fiddle, so all is peace.

Agatha told me she was late, and I thought, I haven’t slept with her in years—she really must be late. I’m going to be a father!

Memory loss is the key to human reproduction. If you remembered what new parenthood was actually like you wouldn’t go around lying to people about how wonderful it is, and you certainly wouldn’t ever do...

The groove is so mysterious. We’re born with it and we lose it and the world seems to split apart before our eyes into stupid and cool. When we get it back, the world unifies...

If one feels the need of something grand, something infinite, something that makes one feel aware of God, one need not go far to find it. I think that I see something deeper, more infinite,...

A first child is your own best foot forward, and how you do cheer those little feet as they strike out. You examine every turn of flesh for precocity, and crow it to the world....

I love how babies look like old people. I saw a baby the other day that looked exactly like my grandpa, only taller.

Is she a good baby? People would ask me. Well, no, I’d say.That swirl of hair on the back of her head. We must have taken a thousand pictures of it.

Having a baby is part of a woman’s life, and it is surely a great waste to be afraid of life.

Her body accepted my brutal seed and took it to swell within, just as the patient earth accepts a falling fruit into its tender soil to cradle and nourish it to grow. Came a time,...

The most out-there thing I’m saying is, ‘Don’t have babies. Don’t get married and have kids. Have a larger life than that.

The baby was a little bit warm — I mean, fair to say, because of the sun — but the baby was fine.

She believed that Maggie was God’s baby and was persistent that she needed to find a way to give her back to God. She tried to find a way to give Maggie back to the...

We started out with seven ‘baby Bells’ and AT and T back in 1984 with the divestiture. Prior to that there was basically one company, AT and T. Today there are many companies offering telephone,...

We are all born rude. No infant has ever appeared yet with the grace to understand how inconsiderate it is to disturb others in the middle of the night.

I don’t dislike babies, though I think very young ones rather disgusting.

Ain’t nothing worse to a mama than losing her baby—

Here we have a baby. It is composed of a bald head and a pair of lungs.

I wonder if babies could be made more efficiently on a conveyer belt.

Big Baby is a monster. He is not the player of the year for nothing.

A pair of young mothers now became the centre of interest. They had risen from their lying-in much sooner than the doctors would otherwise have allowed. (French doctors are always very good about recognizing the...

Being nearly four years old, she was certainly a child: and children are human (if one allows the term “human” a wide sense): but she had not altogether ceased to be a baby: and babies...

It was reported that four babies had their heads crushed in. When people surrendered, they were summarily executed. This was wholesale butchery.

Wondrous hole! Magical hole! Dazzlingly influential hole! Noble and effulgent hole! From this hole everything follows logically: first the baby, then the placenta, then, for years and years and years until death, a way of...

It’s like, wow, she had a baby! That’s crazy! I’m overjoyed and thrilled for her,

Ann: How my heart has ached. How empty I have felt. How I’ve ached to hold my two babies.

Who could plan an attack on secretaries, on engineers, on bank tellers, credit union tellers, and, yes, even babies? … You now know. You have spoken. Terry Nichols could plan such an attack.

He is still a bit of a baby. He’ll get an entry for Cheltenham but not against Denman.

Ten Million Dollar Baby.

In my 26 years I haven’t run into a baby who was rolled over on in bed, or who suffocated next to mom. Possibly it happens, but it happens a lot more often with moms...

There are various methods by which you may achieve ignominy and shame. By murdering a large and respected family in cold blood and afterward depositing their bodies in the water companies’ reservoir, you will gain...

The tabloids, instead of being about alien babies and stuff, it’s my triplets, quadruplets, marriages, feuds.

Little kids talk about the strangest things. They really do.

Trimspa Baby

We made out, and they had a baby.

The memories seem to come in layers. For example, the first memory might be of incest; then they remember robes and candles; next they realize that their father or mother or both were present when...

Big Baby is a monster. He’s going to get his regardless.

The worst feature of a new baby is its mother’s singing