Grace- [on the phone] Yes. This is Grace Adler of Grace Adler Designs. I was in there yesterday. I told you I would be back today. And now you’re telling me you’re all out? Do...

I had dinner with Megan Mullally (

(Jack prepairing to tell his mom he’s gay)Grace: You’d think after 30 years it’d be liberating.Jack: Oh no, we’re not telling her I’m 30!

Ned and Stacey: The Complete First Season

I love you like the mother I had committed against her will.

My Wife & Kids.

Goodbye Prudey McPrude and hello Slutty McSluttenstein!

Will, does it hurt your back….kissing your own ass like that?

Oh cripes honey, let me give it to you in a nutshell. Your boyfriend’s a big, flaming, leather-wearing, man-kissing, disco-dancing, vermont-living, christina aguilera-lovin’, mykonos-going…honey take it home.

Karen- Grace. It’s Christmas, for goodness sake. Think about the baby Jesus: up in that tower, letting his hair down… so that the three wise men can climb up and spin the dradel and see...

[Megan Mullally:] When the stock market dips he blames it on … but it’s, that’s just a little thing.

Karen- OK, rule number one. Unless you’re served in a frosted glass, never come within four feet of my lips.

That is going on the gag reel, that is hilarious.

Grace-[to Jack] Today I’m handing out lollipops and ass-whoopins and right now, I’m all out of lollipops.

But we were at the funeral. We scattered a trash bag full of his ashes!

Jack-This makes me feel like a man. Will-Yeah. Jack- No, seriously, I’m going to need a man after we’re done.

Karen- I’m not good or real…I’m evil, and imaginary.

If you’re here for inspiration, you’re too late. If you’re here for the funeral, you’re too early.

Karen-she was all over you, your JLo’s JMo

Grace- If you’re looking for your Aunt Karen, she’s not here. She doesn’t work on days that end with…”day.”

JLo-so karen hows married life?Karen-well it only lasted 20 minutesJLo-Oh is that short?