In eternity there is no time, only an instant long enough for a joke.

Someone once told me a joke,” he said. “I’d like to be a pacifist, but people keep getting in the way.’ I made a decision to fight for my friend in prison. It was a...

Everything I say is a joke. I am a joke myself.

Superman once challenged Chuck Norris to a fight, the loser had to wear his underwear on the outside.

I definitely believe marijuana helps with menstruation. Since I started smoking pot, my girlfriend’s period has become painless for me

Happiness is a big joke; let us laugh at it loud.

Don’t stop there. I suppose there are also, what, vampires and werewolves and zombies?””Of course there are. Although you mostly find zombies farther south, where the voudun priests are.””What about mummies? Do they only hang...

Richard Feynman was fond of giving the following advice on how to be a genius. You have to keep a dozen of your favorite problems constantly present in your mind, although by and large they...

It’s not a joke if it’s not entirely clear. But most jokes play off of ambiguity and sudden juxtaposition, so a joke has to be clearly unclear.

As far as he could discover, there were no signs of spring. The decay that covered the surface of the mottled ground was not the kind in which life generates. Last year, he remembered, May...

Sorry, no professionals.

Even if it’s a really funny joke, don’t laugh if the devil’s the one telling it!

I told Ersken, “Lately it’s been like living on the knife’s edge, never knowing which side I’ll fall off on”Ersken clapped me on the shoulder as we stepped into the street. “Cheer up, Beka. Maybe...