I make love like my afternoon shadow is long. I’ll bring the foreplay, if you bring the guacamole. (Yes, I know there is a 99-cent upcharge.)

You never forget how to ride a bicycle—or the first time you made love on one. I’ve made love on a bicycle twice, to two women—both times were with both women. Foreplay is amazingly difficult...

Penis is simply an anatomical appendage, as exciting as a finger or a phalange. A willy is something small and flaccid, and at least slightly humorous. Prick is the organ as viewed with distaste, perhaps...

I have come to realize that my stupid gestures excites women alot, and if I’m really stupid, i will dare to take them to bed and excite them even more.

Forcing your love on someone who doesn’t love you is an emotional rape, because your victim’s heart was not aroused, you jumped into it without foreplay.

Rationalization is foreplay with one’s conscience.

When coming to sex: First served, first come.

I would pour you a glass of wine, but wouldn’t it be more romantic if you sipped it out of my armpit?

Looking at what ‘foreplay’ is, ‘sexual intercourse’ is a game.

Instead of reciting her an original love poem using words, I think I’ll use my tongue to more creatively explore the deepest parts of her.

Sex without foreplay is like song’s reff without intro.

If you say renewable, I’ll think energy. If you say fore, I’ll think play. If you say binary, I’ll think anal defibrillator.

You may know where to touch her, but that doesn’t mean you know how to touch her. Take time to learn what she truly desires.

Shaving a sheep is considered foreplay in some countries. But I don’t consider foreplay at all, not even before sex.

I make love like the desert. Ever implemented a cactus during foreplay?