The modern struggle – Lone individuals summoning inhuman willpower, fasting, meditating, and exercising, up against armies of scientists and statisticians weaponizing abundant food, screens, and medicine into junk food, clickbait news, infinite porn, endless games...

New Rule: Food companies must face the facts: One container equals one serving. Look, we’re Americans, and that means once we open the bag, there’s no stopping us until we’re licking stray bits of powdered...

I come bearing gifts in the form of junk food. You’re welcome. I would have brought some drugs, but I’m not a doctor.

I like TV shows that motivate me to want to improve my life, as I sit listless on the sofa hour after hour, night after night. My desire to self-actualize grows with my waistline. If...

foodstuffs absolved of the obligation to provide vitamins and minerals cavorted with reckless abandon.

Keep your friends close, your enemies closer, and the junk food as far away as possble.

I resent when I go out to dinner and they try to sell me the healthy food for the same price as the good food.

Like pornography, junk [food] might be tough to define but you know it when you see it.

What if there were health food stores on every corner in the hood, instead of liquor stores!?

People always slow down for a train wreck. It’s like junk food. If you don’t feel good about yourself, you want to read crap about other people, like gossip in high school. You don’t understand...

In the constant pursuit of perfection, junk food will always be a rather painful stumbling block