Money is like a child—rarely unaccompanied. When it disappears, look to those who were supposed to be keeping an eye on it while you were at the grocery store. You might also look for someone...

The world is swirling with so many mysteries and secrets that nobody will ever track down all of them. But with a book you can stay up very late, reading until all the secrets are...

At times the world may seem an unfriendly and sinister place, but believe that there is much more good in it than bad. All you have to do is look hard enough. and what might...

Everybody will die, but very few people want to be reminded of that fact.

Are you ready?” Klaus asked finally.”No,” Sunny answered.”Me neither,” Violet said, “but if we wait until we’re ready we’ll be waiting for the rest of our lives, Let’s go.

Look!” Mr. Poe said, who was still too far to help but close enough to see. “Genghis has an eye tattoo, like Count Olaf! In fact, I think he IS Count Olaf!””Of course he is!”...

If you were smart,” Genghis said, “you would have borrowed the silverware of one of your friends.””We never thought of that,” Klaus said. When one is forced to tell atrocious lies, one often feels a...

Read about things that wouldn’t keep you up all night long, weeping and tearing out your hair.

Yes, I know,” Isadora said, and then read her poem, leaning forward so Carmelita Spats would not overhear:”I would rather eat a bowl of vampire batsthan spend an hour with Carmelita Spats.”The Baudelaires giggled and...

A library is like an island in the middle of a vast sea of ignorance, particularly if the library is very tall and the surrounding area has been flooded.

I’m afraid it’s not nonsense,” Genghis said, shaking his turbaned head and continuing his story. “As I was saying before the little girl interrupted me, the baby didn’t dash off with the other orphans. She...

Literature doesn’t exactly have a strong mental-health track record.

In between bites of banana, Mr. Remora would tell stories, and the children would write the stories down in notebooks, and every so often there would be a test. The stories were very short, and...

Friends can make you feel that the world is smaller and less sneaky than it really is, because you know people who have similar experiences.

The Baudelaire orphans hung on to one another, and wept and wept while the adults argued endlessly behind them. Finally-as, I’m sorry to say, Count Olaf forced the Quagmires into puppy costumes so he could...

Tea should be as bitter as wormwod and as sharp as a two eged swordKit Snicket (a series of unfortunate events)

Well, Nero,” Genghis said, “I just wanted to give you this rose-a small gift of congratulations for the wonderful concert you gave us last night!””Oh, thank you,” Nero said, taking the rose out of Genghis’s...

You don’t spend your life hanging around books without learning a thing or two.

If the Baudelaire orphans had been stalks of celery, they would not have been small children in great distress, and if they had been lucky, Carmelita Spats would have not approached their table at this...

Occasionally, events in one’s life become clearer through the prism of experience, a phrase which simply means that things tend to be clearer as time goes on. For instance, when a person is just born,...

You write poetry?” Klaus asked.He had read a lot about poets but had never met one.”Just a little bit,” Isadora said modestly. “I write poems down in this notebook. It’s an interest of mine.””Sappho!” Sunny...