I let steam off by watching ‘Downton Abbey.’

I mean, Charlie and I have never had issues pleasuring each other before, but damn, Charlie getting pregnant equals crazy sex. Wild sex. Sex that makes me feel like I’m being used. Best. Feeling.Ever.

Measurements is your saving grace if you want to raise steam.

I’d rather fake my own fog, than fake a steamy love scene. Can I interest you in some mist? It’s homemade.

I drink coffee like steam is the ghost of dead water. Ever tried inhaling the afterlife?

Love is like water, except it’s either fog or ice. I make love like a steamy 32 degrees.

I can bench press steam, but not fog. I just have to wait until the fog lifts itself.

If you’re ever in a ghost town, it’s only appropriate to visit the cemetery. Also, ever thought that coffee’s steam is the rising soul of your dead sleep?

Living on steam isn’t easy.