Harry,” Bob drawled, his eye lights flickering smugly, “what you know about women, I could juggle.

Many things are not as they seem: The worst things in life never are.

I don’t care about whose DNA has recombined with whose. When everything goes to hell, the people who stand by you without flinching–they are your family.

You need to know where to go,’ Sanya said.’Yes,”And you are going to consult four large pizzas for guidance.”Yes,’ I said….’There is, I think, humour here which does not translate well from English into sanity.”That’s...

A man’s magic demonstrates what sort of person he is, what is held most deeply inside of him. There is no truer gauge of a man’s character than the way in which he employs his...

No one just starts giggling and wearing black and signs up to become a villainous monster. How the hell do you think it happens? It happens to people. Just people. They make questionable choices, for...

Yes, I was standing on nothing but congealed starlight. Yes, I was walking up through a savage storm, the wind threatening to tear me off and throw me into the freezing waters of Lake Michigan...

Laugh whenever you can. Keeps you from killing yourself when things are bad. That and vodka.

An errand is getting a tank of gas or picking up a carton of milk or something. It is not getting chased by flying purple pyromaniac gorillas hurling incendiary poo!

You can have everything in the world, but if you don’t have love, none of it means crap,” he said promptly. “Love is patient. Love is kind. Love always forgives, trusts, supports, and endures. Love...

Did you really save the world ?…- Mostly I was saving my own ass. Just happend that the world was in the same spot.

Know your enemy. Know yourself. Only then may you achieve victory.

Fear is a part of life. It’s a warning mechanism. That’s all. It tells you when there’s danger around. Its job is to help you survive. Not cripple you into being unable to do it.

I wish I worried about my uncle’s opinions, and had problems to work out with my mom. Hell, I’d settle for knowing what her voice sounded like.” I put a hand on her shoulder. “Trite...

Thomas has the kind of whiter-than-white boyish grin that makes women’s panties spontaneously evaporate.

Vanity, thy name is vampire.

It must be tempered with discipline. Ferocity is useless unless employed in the proper place . . .

Sir,” said the guard from behind me. “I’d appreciate it if you left your club here.”I paused and looked over my shoulder, He had a gun. His hand wasn’t exactly resting on it, but he’d...

Kids. You gotta love them. I adore children. A little salt, a squeeze of lemon–perfect.

I think that men ought to treat women like something other than weaker men with breasts.

Magic comes from the heart, from your feelings, your deepest expressions of desire. That’s why black magic is so easy—it comes from lust, from fear and anger, from things that are easy to feed and...

Fire isn’t always an element of destruction. Classical alchemical doctrine teaches that it also has dominion over another province: change.

…when women have a conversation, they’re communicating on five levels. They follow the conversation that they’re actually having, the conversation that is specifically being avoided, the tone being applied to the overt conversation, the buried...

What is the point of having free will if one cannot occasionally spit in the eye of destiny?

I grunted. It’s something I picked up over a fifteen-year career in law enforcement. Men have managed to create a complex and utterly impenetrable secret language consisting of monosyllabic sounds and partial words—and they are...

Now I feel like James Bond. Suave and intelligent, breaking all the codes while looking fabulous.

And since when had I become the guy that things happened to ten years ago?

Hell’s holy stars and freaking stones shit bells.

There are things you can’t walk away from. Not if you want to live with yourself afterward.

There is a primal reassurance in being touched, in knowing that someone else, someone close to you, wants to be touching you. There is a bone-deep security that goes with the brush of a human...

Right,’ Thomas said. ‘Where are we headed?”To where they treat me like royalty,’ I said.’We’re going to Burger King?’I rubbed the heel of my hand against my forehead and spelled fratricide in a subvocal mutter,...

It rained toads the day the White Council came to town.

It doesn’t make you a monster to want, she said, her voice very gentle. It’s what you do with it that matters.

We are as the dead,” Sha said. “Our purpose is to dedicate our lives to the service of our lord. And, when it is necessary, to surrender those lives. When we become what we are,...

Whenever you’ve got a choice, do good, kiddo. It isn’t always fun or easy, but in the long run it makes your life better.

I ask people impertinent questions. Hopefully turning up pertinent answers.

Are you always a smartass?’Nope. Sometimes I’m asleep.

I love being a wizard. Every day is like Disneyland.

If you go to your death rather than do everything you might to prevent what is happening, you are merely committing suicide and trying to make yourself feel better about it. That is the act...

Courage is about learning how to function despite the fear, to put aside your instincts to run or give in completely to the anger born from fear. Courage is about using your brain and your...

You beg fate to make your fears into reality, Aleran. But for the moment, they are only fears. They may come. If so, then face them and overcome them. Until then, pay them no mind....

What’s with that?’ Butters screamed, his voice high and frightened. ‘Just covering his head with his arms? Didn’t he see the lawyer in the movie?

So we get a plan,” I said. “Any suggestions?””Blow up the building,” Kincaid said without looking up. “That works good for vampires. Then soak what’s left in gasoline. Set it on fire. Then blow it...

I like to think of it less as embezzling and more as an involuntary goodwill contribution.

If you make some comment even obliquely alluding to menstruation or menopause and its effect on my judgment,” Murphy interrupted, “I will break your arm in eleven places.

You know how confusing the whole good-evil concept is for me.

Age is always advancing and I’m fairly sure it’s up to no good.

I sometimes give myself excellent advice. Occasionally, I even listen to it.

Revenge is like sex, Mister Dresden. It’s best when it comes on slow, quiet, until it all seems inexorable.

Jobs are a part of life. Maybe you’ve heard of the concept. It’s called work? See, what happens is that you suffer through doing annoying and humiliating things until you get paid not enough money....