Do not go where you don’t belong. I scoffed. That sounded like an invitation if I ever heard one.

I never scoff at coffins, because they’re like coffee cups you can bathe in. Well, coffins are like Starbucks’ coffee cups, only they have more life inside.

And benefits? Just getting to breathe the same air as the distinguished guests that’ll scoff and sneer at me is more reward than I could imagine this side of heaven.

The age of lost innocence varies for each person. Some lose it when they learn that their childhood fantasies are merely myth, while others lose theirs due to trauma. As adults, we often look down...