What do you call someone who watches you in your private moments? They used to be called a pervert, but now they’re called an NSA agent.

I was born with a lazy eye. It didn’t define me as a person. It did, however, define me as a voyeur.

There are going to be a lot of eyes on this year’s annual Blindfold Convention. People always want to watch what they can’t watch.

I’ll sit on a soda and drink a sofa. It’s just healthier. You should see how I make love. Show starts at 8:00. Tickets are ten bucks at the window.

Sunny days are the perfect days to spy on people. Especially at night (offer only valid for residents of Alaska).