You can never have too much money.

You know you are capitalism’s ideal puppet (and that education betrayed you) when winning the lottery is your only chance to realizing financial freedom.

I guess I think of lotteries as a tax on the mathematically challenged.

What is the likelihood, of winning the lottery, then lose it all the next day when you step out your front door and get struck by lightning? Probably, very slim, but then anything is possible.

You got up off the bathroom floor. That’s a start. Now, just stay off the floor. After all—aside from winning the lottery—all any of us can ever really hope for is more days spent standing...

It’s much harder to twist the charitable arm of a lottery winner compared to that of a man at his lowest ebb. It sounds like the wrong way round at first, but when you really...

Luck is not as random as you think.Before that lottery ticket won the jackpot, someone had to buy it.

Getting struck by lightning is like winning the lottery, only it’ll ruin your life faster.

Winning the lottery is all skill, and that’s why I don’t play—because it would be unfair to all the other competitors. I’m like that as a lover too, always thinking about the other competitors.

Knock on wood, but I think we hit the gestational carrier lottery!

I think the people of Alabama now realize that they would rather have Don’s lottery than Bob and Lucy’s taxes.

Extended family is great. If you want to know how extended your family is, just go out and win the lottery. Your phone will be ringing nonstop. And you know I’ll call you too, because...

He said, ‘If I ever win the lottery, I would see the world. I want to go to France and Greece.’ He wanted to go everywhere.