You know,” she said, stirring her tea, “the fastest way to get him off your back is to sleep with him. And tell him you love him. Preferably while in bed.”I smirked and the tea...

I thought of telling him that if it wasn’t for Oklahoman cowboys and Mexican whores having a bit of fun, there would’ve been no Texans, but that would be counterproductive.

Georgie, stop trying to resurrect the shoes. They were never alive in the first place.

Who snitched?””We have people monitoring police radio frequencies. They gave Jim a heads-up in case our security had to storm PAD offices and bust you out of there. I found out when I saw Jim...

Torch strode over and stared at the fiver”What’s this?””Some change for you. Buy your flunkies some decent clothes.” I dipped my fingers into the jar and smeared think fragrant paste on my face. Torch frowned,...

I glanced at Derek. The boy wonder didn’t melt into a pile of goo, although his gaze was glued to Rowena’s chest. Avoiding eye contact. Good strategy.

When life backs you into a corner and offers you no escape, when your friends, your lover, and your family abandon you, when you’re at the end of your rope, panicked, alone, and losing your...

How is it different?”He rolled his head back, sable hair falling down on his shoulders. “With Rose I knew what to say. I could take a step back and talk to her. I remembered all...

He lunged for the maps. I grabbed the chair and hit him with it. He went down. I hit him again to make sure he stayed that way, stepped over him, and picked up the...

I know it may come as a shock, but it’s sort of considered polite to wait for the consent of the woman. In fact, I’m pretty sure that if you don’t wait, you may have...

She surveyed the carnage behind him. “Did you have fun?”He showed her his teeth. “Yes.

Tiny gold sparks flared in his irises. “You’re in my rooms in my bathtub naked and you’re still mouthing off.”Did he expect anything different? “Hey, I didn’t kick or punch you in the throat. I...

The vampire leaned forward, tapping a scimitar claw. “Is that a lion with horns and a pitchfork?””Yep.””Is he carrying a moon on his pitchfork?””No, it’s a pie.

Im’s offspring stare at stars and make clocks that calculate useless happenings like the angle of a hawk’s claws as it strikes its prey. They demonstrate their contraptions and everyone marvels. My children get drunk,...

Next to me, Saiman smiled. “We all want what we can’t have, Kate. I want you, you want love, and he wants to break my neck.

Audrey turned to him, a sly little spark hiding in her eyes. “THe only man who gets to call me’love’ would be waking up next to me after a very, very fun night. Fun night....

You know anything about investigative work?””Sure. Annoy the people involved until the guilt party tries to make you go away.

Nice plan. Take the gullible outsiders, walk them around for a bit, then feed them to the giant tortoise.

He had the prettiest hair she had ever seen on a man: dark brown, almost black, and soft like sable, it fell down to his shoulders. She wondered what he’d do if she threw some...

I looked at him. “You really need to work on your threats. I can’t tell if you’re threatening me or inviting me for tea.

It’s a party house.””I hope for your sake it’s a very tame party.” If he brought me to some sort of sex orgy, he would fly right through one of those pretty windows, headfirst.

No more tubs for me.” I jumped off the bed and pulled on a pair of Pack sweats. “They make me lose all sense.”Curran sprawled on the bed with a big self-satisfied smile. “Want to...

You’ll lose.””What makes you so sure?””You have no discipline. All you do is tear down shit down. My father is a bastard, but at least he builds things. You turn cities into smoking ruins and...

I realized that I’m a child.”William looked point-blank at her chest. “No.

If I fought for them and was crippled, they would all say nice things,and then they would replace me and forget I was ever there. You would stay with me. You would take care of...

I hit him on the back of the neck. He submerged. Help. I’ve drowned the Beast Lord.

Kid 1: *examining my gorgeous strawberry and blueberry pies*: Wow, Mom, your pies don’t look awful this time.Me (Ilona): …~A little later~Kid 2: *wandering into the kitchen*Kid 1: Hey, you’ve got to see these pies....

Rene, you want us to find you-don’t-know-who and to retrieve his you-don’t-know-what for you-won’t-tell-me-whom?

On the other hand it was bad manners to look a gift horse in the mouth. Even if you’re getting it from an overweight cracker in a fringe shirt.