I’m hungry to win. I should enter a hotdog eating contest.

People say I can handle pressure, but there is one sporting competition where if I were in the finals, I’d surely choke, and that’s the hotdog eating competition.

Big food companies make hot dogs with mechanically separated meat (msm) that, as described matter-of-factly by the [USDA], is “a paste-like and batter-like meat product produced by forcing bones with attached edible meat under high...