You may be temporarily young, but you’ll forever be childish.” Then I put gum in her hair.

Somewhere, on some sidewalk, is a piece of gum with my shoe’s imprint patterned on it. You must find it and bring it to justice.

I stepped in gum. It was just floating on the water.

The gum looked fresh. I sniffed it and it smelled all right. I licked it and waited for a while. When I did not die, I crammed it into my mouth: Wrigley’s Double Mint.

Jason Sudeikis is always chewing gum.