If it doesn’t sweat, jiggle, or pant, it’s not alive.
Do we have a hand mirror?’ I asked from the kitchen doorway.’Never use one,’ said Lester, examining the date on a carton of sour cream.’Naturally, you’re a male. What you see is what you’ve got,’ I said resentfully.’Huh?’ said Lester.
I used to think that when I grew up there wouldn’t be so many rules. Back in elementary school there were rules about what entrance you used in the morning, what door you used going home, when you could talk in the library, how many paper towels you could use in the rest room, and...
The world is full of unrequited love,’ I said finally.’You and Patrick having problems?’ Dad said, reaching around to get the butter out of the fridge.’No, I was just wondering what you would say if I was a lesbian.”Come again?’ said Lester. ‘I’m having a hard time following this conversation.
One way to tell if you’re really comfortable with a person is if you can be quiet together sometimes and not feel awkward. If you don’t feel obligated to say something brilliant or funny or surprising or cool. You can just be together. You can just be.
You can’t. There’s not just one person in the world who’s your type. There’s a whole group with the same likes and dislikes. But you want to spend your whole life looking for all of them? You just feel that everything’s right. You’re at peace with yourself.
You don’t have to be part of a couple to be happy, you know.
If you are embarrassed about your sex, it must mean that you feel there is something demeaning or disgusting about being female. You are all wondrously made, girls. Remember that: wondrously made, and you should carry your sex proudly, a badge of honor.
Sexually active? Sexually active? Patrick and I hadn’t even learned the fine points of kissing yet!I marched on down. ‘For your information,’ I said from the doorway, as both Dad and Lester jerked to attention, ‘I am about as sexually active as a bag of spinach, and if you want to keep me on the...