lovemaking.

I’m not talking about faith in God, I’m talking about faith in Mark Watney

Space is dangerous. It’s what we do here. If you want to play it safe all the time, go join an insurance company.

The cost for my survival must have been hundreds of millions of dollars. All to save one dorky botanist. Why bother?Well, okay. I know the answer to that. Part of it might be what I...

I’m Hindu.

How did I end up in this situation? I’m the district sales manager of a napkin factor. Why is my daughter in space?

One thing I have in abundance here are bags. They’re not much different than kitchen trash bags, though I’m sure they cost $50,000 because of NASA.

In other news, It’s seven sols till the harvest, and I still haven’t prepared. For starters, I need to make a hoe. Also, I need to make an outdoor shed for the potatoes. I can’t...

They hate you.””Why?””Cause you’re a dick, Mitch.

It’s a strange feeling. Everywhere I go, I’m the first. Step outside the rover? First guy ever to be there! Climb a hill? First guy to climb that hill! Kick a rock? That rock hadn’t...

Just three words? Nothing about his physical health? His equipment? His supplies?”You got me,’ she said. ‘He left a detailed status report. I just decided to lie for no reason.”Funny,’ Venkat said. ‘Be a smart-ass...

If ruining the only religious icon I have leaves me vulnerable to Martian vampires, I’ll have to risk it.

Conclusion: I don’t need the water reclaimer at all. I’ll drink as needed and dump my waste outdoors. Yeah, that’s right, Mars, I’m gonna piss and shit on you. That’s what you get for trying...

As with most of life’s problems, this one can be solved by a box of pure radiation.

The NSA?””Yeah, they called and offered to help out. Same software they use for enhancing spy satellite imagery.”Venkat shrugged. “It’s amazing how much red tape gets cut when everyone’s rooting for one man to survive.

WATNEY: Look! A pair of boobs! -> (.Y.).

None of you got laid in high school, did you?

Log Entry: SOL 118My conversation with NASA about the Water Reclaimer was boring and riddled with technical details. So I’ll paraphrase for you:Me: “This is obviously a clog. How about I take it apart and...