Comedy is simply a funny way of being serious

To refuse awards is another way of accepting them with more noise than is normal.

I have three daughters and I find as a result I played King Lear almost without rehearsal

It is of course, reprehensible to steal from others, but plain stupid to steal from yourself

It is youth that has discovered love as a weapon

The truth is really an ambition which is beyond us.

The only reason I made a commercial for American Express was to pay off my American Express Bill”- Peter Ustinov, 1921-2004

Children are the only form of immortality that we can be sure of.

He shows great originality, which must be curbed at all cost

It is our responsibilities, not ourselves, that we should take seriously.

The habit of religion is oppressive, an easy way out of thought

The sound of laughter has always seemed to me the most civilized music in the universe.

Unfortunately, the balance of nature decrees that a super-abundance of dreams is paid for by a growing potential for nightmares.

uncontrolled photography is one of the blights of our time.

Critics search for ages for the wrong word, which, to give them credit, they eventually find.

Laughter… the most civilized music in the world.

In America, through pressure of conformity, there is freedom of choice, but nothing to choose from.

Monica Seles: I’d hate to be next door to her on her wedding night.

If the world should blow itself up, the last audible voice would be that of an expert saying it can’t be done.

Courage is often lack of insight, whereas cowardice in many cases is based on good information.

New York, as run by the Swiss.

Laughter would be bereaved if snobbery died

I am an optimist, unrepentant and militant. After all, in order not to be a fool an optimist must know how sad a place the world can be. It is only the pessimist who finds...

Books, I don’t know what you see in them . . . I can understand a person reading them, but I can’t for the life of me see why people have to write them.

Parents are the bones on which children cut their teeth.

There is no question but that if Jesus Christ, or a great prophet from another religion, were to come back today, he would find it virtually impossible to convince anyone of his credentials despite the...

Sex is a conversation carried out by other means. If you get on well out of bed, half the problems of bed are solved.

Intelligent or not, we all make mistakes and perhaps the intelligent mistakes are the worst, because so much careful thought has gone into them

At the age of four with paper hats and wooden swords we’re all Generals. Only some of us never grow out of it.

A diplomat these days is nothing but a head-waiter who’s allowed to sit down occasionally.

The point of living and of being an optimist is to be foolish enough to believe the best is yet to come.

Contrary to general belief, I do not believe that friends are necessarily the people you like best, they are merely the people who got there first

Playwrights are like men who have been dining for a month in an Indian restaurant. After eating curry night after night, they deny the existence of asparagus.

The truth is an ambition which is beyond us.

The French and the British are such good enemies that they can’t resist being friends.

I imagine hell like this: Italian punctuality, German humour and English wine.

People who reach the top of the tree are only those who haven’t got the qualifications to detain them at the bottom.

Comedy is simply a funny way of being serious.

People at the top of the tree are those without qualifications to detain them at the bottom.

I have four children which is not bad considering I’m not a Catholic.

As for being a General, well, at the age of four with paper hates and wooden swords, we’re all Generals. Only some of us never grow out of it.

Marriage is like a three-speed gearbox affection, friendship, love. It is not advisable to crash your gears and go right through to love straightaway. You need to ease your way through. The basis of love...

Parents are the bone on which children sharpen their teeth

Love is an act of endless forgiveness, a tender look which becomes a habit.

the social sciences were for all those who had not yet decided what to do with their lives, and for all those whose premature frustrations led them into the sterile alleys of confrontation.

Her virtue was that she said what she thought, her vice that what she thought didn’t amount to much.

Books, I don’t know what you see in them. I can understand a person reading them, but I can’t for the life of me see why people have to write them.

Since we are destined to live out our lives in the prison of our minds, it is our duty to furnish it well.

By increasing the size of the keyhole, today’s playwrights are in danger of doing away with the door.

Men think about women. Women think about what men think about them.