Maybe I’m just sick of putting more into this friendship than I get out of it.

Please allow me the honour of allowing you to bestow upon me a blowjob.

…before I was going to college, my secret plan was to one day not tell anybody and just get on some bus to some random city and just move there and become this totally different...

Dear Josh, we stopped by to fuck you but you didn’t answer the door. Therefore you are gay. Sincerely, Tiffany and Amber.

C’mon, let’s go in my room and abuse drugs and stuff!

Why aren’t you girls out stealing hubcaps or shoplifting like normal children?

He always accuses me of trying to look’cool’, I was like, ‘everybody tries to look cool, I just happen to be successful.

Everybody just lets the media do their thinking for them… that’s why you’ll never hear any reggae on the radio!