HELPMATE, n. A wife, or bitter half.””Now, why is yer wife called a helpmate, Pat?”” Says the priest. “”Since the time ‘o yer wooin’ She’s niver [sic] assisted in what ye were at — For it’s naught ye are ever doin’.””””That’s true of yer Riverence [sic],”” Patrick replies, And no sign of contrition envices;””But, bedad, it’s a fact which the word implies, For she helps to mate the expinses [sic]!”” –Marley Wottel



