In the world of mulesThere are no rules.

Professional men, they have no cares; whatever happens, they get theirs.

Parents were invented to make children happy by giving them something to ignore.

A family is a unit composed not only of children but of men, women, an occasional animal, and the common cold.

Oh, what a tangled web do parents weave when they think that their children are naive.

Middle age is when you’re sitting at home on a Saturday night and the telephone rings and you hope it isn’t for you.

Life is not having been told that the man has just waxed the floor.

Happiness is having a scratch for every itch.

Were it not for frustration and humiliationI suppose the human race would get ideas above its station.

I hope my tongue in prune juice smothers, If I belittle dogs and mothers.