Hiya kids. Here is an important message from your Uncle Bill. Don’t buy drugs. Become a pop star, and they give you them for free.

No one’s ever going to shag you if you cry all the time.

Jamie: It’s my favorite time of day, driving you. Aurelia: [in Portuguese] It is the saddest part of my day, leaving you.

Mia: I’ll just be hanging round the mistletoe, hoping to be kissed.

Prime Minister: [on the phone to his sister] I’m very busy and important. How can I help you?

Juliet: We’ve never got friendly. I just wanted to say I hope that can change. I’m nice, I really am, apart from my terrible taste in pie. And it would be great if we could...

Whenever I get gloomy with the state of the world, I think about the arrivals gate at Heathrow Airport. General opinion’s starting to make out that we live in a world of hatred and greed,...

Let’s go get the shit kicked out of us by love.

When the planes hit the Twin Towers, as far as I know, none of the phone calls from the people on board were messages of hate or revenge- they were all messages of love