Why can’t I be the adorable one?

I actually turned down an opportunity for a private interview with Adolph Hitler.

Doorman – a genius who can open the door of your car with one hand, help you in with the other, and still have one left for the tip.

I am not a grammarian. Maybe my style is eccentric.

I don’t need a psychiatrist. I’m Catholic.

I think sometimes it is more important to be gracious than to win.

I’m off to race around the world-a race against time and two men. I know I can beat time. I hope I can beat the men.

Lenny Bruce is a very moral man trying to improve the world and trying to make audiences think.

My children have no prejudices at all. My own brother-in-law is Jewish!

Sodomy is in the Bible, to be read in churches. I wouldn’t rule it out of Mr. Bruce’s act if he cares to comment on it.

Things said to a reporter in confidence should be kept in confidence.